When You Loved Me - Aziraphale X Crowley (Finished)

Chapter 2

"I didn't want you to find out like this."

"W... When?"

"Do you remember the day of our fight in St James park?" Crowley nodded looking with confusion into the Angel's eyes. "Do you remember following me into the street?"

"No? I went home straight after our fight."

"No Crowley... You didn't." Aziraphale replied softly. "You stayed there for a while before running after me." A weakened smile drew onto the Angel's face at the memory.

------------------------------------------------------------

The angel stepped out onto the road as the crossing light turned green, only to be pulled by the wrist by a wide eyed demon as he was half way across.

"I'm never gonna leave you Angel." The redhead told him firmly. "But we both know things could go wrong. And if something were to happen to you... I wouldn't want to be here either."

"But Crowley..."

"No Angel. I love you. And I don't want to live without you." The words shocked the angel to the core. For so long he had loved the demon, believing that the demon would never reciprocate. Yet here he was, revealing exactly how the angel had felt for so long.

On the verge of tears, Aziraphale gripped onto Crowley, pulling him down to let their lips meet. Around them, the lights had changed; humans were honking their horns and yelling at them to move and they just stood there oblivious, kissing in the street.

------------------------------------------------------------

"You refused to leave my side for days after that. Then you ended up just moving into the bookshop with me. Your love for me had risen to the surface and wasn't going back down." Aziraphale smiled, his eyes glazed over with memory. "We were together for about two years." He sighed. "The best two years of my existence."

"What exactly happened?" The angel pulled back into himself.

"We were in our little home just outside of Cairo. We were just sitting on the bed talking. Trying to figure out what we were going to do."

"What do you mean?"

"You were still pretty upset by what Hell had made you do. It weighed on you for weeks."

"Why can't I remember this? What had they made me do?" Aziraphale looked up at him sadly.

"Crowley, my dear, do you really want to know?"

"Aziraphale..."

"January 18, 1864." He answered quietly. "They made you set fire to a church killing two and a half thousand humans." The paleness of the demon put even the angel's wings to shame. "Please try to remember dear that you had no choice."

"And you still somehow loved me despite that?"

"No Crowley. I love you. Period. There is no 'despite' anything. I love all of you. I hate that they forced you to do that. But I don't love them. I love you."

"Still? After everything. It's been over a century since then!"

"Yes Crowley. And I love you eternally." Crowley froze. Eventually, freeing Crowley from his state of confusion, Aziraphale kept talking. "Anyway. We ended up sleeping together that night. You fell desperately ill. So I took away your love for me. You forgot our entire relationship. Everytime you had felt love for me was taken from your mind."

"What if I were feeling it again?"

"What dear?"

"Love. For you."

"I..." The angel looked into the Demon's eyes wondering if it were even possible. "Crowley, I'm not even sure you can."

"But I do Angel. I love you." Hiding his eyes away from the demon, Aziraphale turned away to face the sea. The angel was certain that Crowley would never again be capable of loving him. The Demon's love for the angel still resided within Aziraphale's essence. It can't be exchanged and can't be returned. Could it be possible for a new love for the angel to be formed? The angel so desperately wanted Crowley back. But seeing the danger it could cause to a demon frightened him beyond comprehension.

Crowley interrupted Aziraphale's churning mind as he wrapped his arms around the angel from behind. Lightly he pulled Aziraphale closer against his chest. The movement so familiar and so comforting and missed by the blonde so deeply, tears fell from his eyes. He couldn't bring himself to refrain from placing his own arms over the Demon's, linking their fingers together. His heart aching and his lungs drowning. That's when Crowley's low, steady and strong voice quietly found their way to Aziraphale's ear.

"Don't think I don't know what you're thinking Angel. I am in love with you again. I don't understand it but I am. And it's always been dangerous, we'll be careful this time. But I won't lose you. And I'm not gonna leave you again." Aziraphale remained silent. He couldn't think of what to say. He knew he needed to say something, but what? He remained facing the horizon with the tears he refused to let his demon see and settled for squeezing his arms tighter over Crowley's, hoping that would convey enough of a message for now. And it did. Crowley understood completely. He would be the same had the roles been switched. He remembered running into that burning bookshop thinking Aziraphale was gone. And if it had been because he had been hanging around the angel, he'd be hesitant to still be there too. But wasn't love worth fighting for?

"I'm so scared Crowley," Aziraphale whispered almost mutely. Slowly he turned around in the Demon's arms. The redhead ran a hand over the side of the angel's head. Aziraphale opened his mouth to say more but no words would come out. Crowley's hand slightly tilted the Angel's head up to meet his eyes.

"Let's go to dinner angel. There's a quiet little restaurant not far from here. I hear they do extraodinary lasagnas." The angel smiled as he looked into the golden eyes before him. Crowley smiled back, softly brushing away the Angel's tears. Aziraphale couldn't deny the relief he felt. The realization that they had an eternity to figure this out together. They were on their own side now. They didn't need to worry about heaven and hell anymore. They had each other and they could figure out everything else slowly and carefully.