The other side of love

Reality

Chapter 12

After the wedding everyone but my Aunt and Ntlaka left. They had to stay in a room with me for a week, during which I had to follow Rendani around and listen to her teach me about their traditions. What was expected of me, how we would run the household. I pick up that Khathu never mentioned anything about me going back to PE because she spoke as if we will be housemates. Silly girl.
Rendani" We will divide the cooking duties depending on our schedules. We have a lady that helps clean the house but it's our duty to cook for our husband"
Me" I can't cook"
Rendani" What do you mean?"
Me" I burn boiling water"
"Khathu usually cooks for us or I just get us takeaways"
Rendani" He cooks?"
Me" Yea, I can't and I've been to cooking classes. It didn't end well for anyone"
She didn't say anything, we carried on walking. We spent the whole day speaking about God knows what and I was just ready to sleep.
" Are we done for the day?"
I asked her and she just nodded. I grabbed my phone and was ready to bounce.
"Xolisa"
She said and I looked at her, she looked like she wanted to say something but wasn't sure if she should. Yes, I got all of that from her facial expression.
" I'll see you tomorrow"
That's all she said and I offered a smile.
" See you tomorrow"

The first thing I did when I arrived at my "house" was cry, I jumped into the shower and cried some more. This has been a week from hell, I missed my son, my parents and my friends. To think I'll be here for 6 months, my Aunt and Ntlaka will go back to PE on Monday then I'll have no one here.
"Xoli!"
I turned off the water then quickly wiped my tears because I know Ntlaka will come inside the bathroom.
" Ndiyeza"
I shouted. I got of the shower, then went to her.
Ntlaka" Your sister in law was here and we are invited to supper"
Me" You guys go, I have a lot of work to do"
She stared at me, I cleared my throat then wiped my tears.
Ntlaka" Why are you crying?"
Me" Tears of joy"
I chuckled then shrugged
" Go have fun, promise I'll be fine"
Ntlaka" What's wrong? It's just us, your Aunt went for a walk"
Me" I don't think I can pull off six months here"
" I can't tell Khathu, he is always giving and all I do is take, now it's my turn to sacrifice but I am miserable apha. They don't want me here and they make it so obvious, I try, God! Do I try but his mother goes out of her way to treat me like trash and I can't tell him because he loves his mom so much!. So I just take it but fuck! I don't know how long I can put up with this"
Ntlaka" Tell him, there's no way he would take her side. And you can't let her bully you Xolisa"
Me" I wanted to marry Khathu, well now I am married to him. I have to just get used to this"
Ntlaka" And cry everyday?"
" That's not normal, you are supposed to be happy, you just got married like 4 days ago"
Me" I'll be fine"
Ntlaka" Let's just go to the shops, get some food and alcohol, I'll cook for us. We can watch Ugly Betty until we fall asleep or just get drunk and prank call your in laws"
We both giggled, I gave her a hug.
Me" Thank you for staying behind"
Ntlaka" That's what friends do for each other"
" Now go get dressed"
Me" I can't go out without Rendani"
" Or I need to report to her that we are going out"
Ntlaka" I have so much to say but I'll just go get dress too"
Me" Whatever hahaha"
I ran to my room and quickly changed into biker shorts, an oversized Kids see ghosts sweater then grabbed my Yeezy 700. I didn't bother with make up just lip gloss and wore a bucket hat.
" Done!!"
I shouted then went to the fridge to grab some water for us. Ntlaka was wearing a dress with Stan Smith sneakers and a bucket hat too.
Me" Copy cat"
Ntlaka" Oh shit! Look atchu!"
I giggled
Me" I quickly have to go to the main house to report that I'm going out. Meet you in the car?"
Ntlaka" You driving?"
Me" When we return"
I left, the main house wasn't ready far from my house but since this land is huge they are further apart, it's almost like going three houses away from your own house. I called her because there was no way I was going to take off my shoes or bend to greet whoever was in there because they are never short of visitors.
" Please come outside"
Then I hug up, Ntlaka pulled up while I was still waiting for Rendani.
" You done?"
She asked
Me" Nope, ndilindile"
She finally came outside and she looked confused when she saw me.
"Going to the shops with Ntlaka, you did say I need to report to you this week"
She cleared her throat
Rendani" What are you wearing?"
Me" My clothes"
Rendani" We gave you clothes to wear for this whole week"
Me" And I have been wearing them but I'm going out now, there's no way I'm wearing those long dresses"
" Is there anything you want?"
Rendani" You are not supposed to go out!"
Me" I'm not your child, this was me being decent. I didn't have to do it, I don't like your tone"
Rendani" You are a guest here for a week and we have traditions, I told you about them and you doing this right now, is a bad reflection of my teachings"
Me" Don't worry, I don't care what they think of me"
Rendani" But he does and right now, I am starting to think he was wrong about you"
Me" That will make great pillow take conversation then"
I walked to the car and we left.
" Not me wanting to say "and you are upsetting me and my home girl" hahahaa I feel so stupid"
Ntlaka" I worry about you"
Me" I know, wait let me play a song. It's about girls in a relationship though but I think it makes sense for our friendship too"
I played Kehlani's Honey, turns out she already knew it. We were singing along until we arrived at our destination.
Me" Let's start at KFC then go buy what we need for our slumber party"
We ended up driving around after getting everything we came for. We went back to the house after 9 p.m. because I suggested we go to News cafe.

We were both tipsy, we just took the bottle of champagne and vodka, then she grabbed the KFC bucket.  As soon as we opened the door, the look on my Aunt made me sober.
" Yabona le uyenze namhlanje? Ayiyo tuu! I am so disappointed Xolisa. Ndihleleli le nonsense apha? Hay niyazenza izimanga Ntlaka! You both know I don't mind when you guys do your thing but this one? Time and place"
We both listened to her shout at us, I needed to pee but decided not to go because that might piss her off even more.
" Khathu was here earlier, you need to grow up mntanam. I love you and I am telling you this from the bottom of my heart; you will ruin your marriage if you don't learn how to prioritize"
She dropped all these bombs, dished up some meat for herself then went to her room.

By midnight Ntlka had already passed out, I woke her up then she went to sleep in the bedroom. I decided to go outside to get some air, I walked around the yard. I haven't seen Khathu for a while, the last time I saw him was the morning after wedding and we barely texted.
" Hulisani?"
The voice startled me, I turned around and I giggled when I saw it was Khathu. I took off my headphones then switched off the music.
Me" Hey"
" I don't think I'll ever get used to you calling me by that name"
Khathu" I was just practising"
Me" I heard you came by earlier"
Khathu" Yea"
" You should go back to bed"
I looked at him, for a good second and I imagined our marriage. Our life together, I tried to imagine how happy I would be.
Me" I am going back to PE tomorrow morning"
" I don't know what I expected but this isn't it"
Khathu" Really?"
Me" I told you I wasn't ready for marriage, I can't do this whole thing. It's exhausting and I am just not okay"
Khathu" You think it was easy for me? Do you honestly think it's been hard for just you?"
" I just spent hours arguing with my elders because my wife is wearing fucken tights in my ancestral home!. A week, that's all I needed from you and you went on to embarrass me!. And you stand there and tell me how miserable you are?"
Me" I never wanted to come here in the first place! I told you Khathu that I don't do well with families! You knew that and you took me and threw me in the deep end. I am drowning, I can't speak to you, I have to go through your wife, I can't say or do anything without your mother and aunt's criticism. So yes, I am exhausted and I don't want to be here"
Khathu" You sacrifice! That's marriage, you make sacrifices for your spouse"
Me" Even my happiness? I have been crying since I got to this place! You don't even check up on me. I took one day, and you are telling me about how embarrassed you are. How about you compliment me on the days that I did everything that was asked of me? The days when they all stop about me in TshiVenda or thr days when I was accused of being a gold digger. Where were you?. I can't fight you and fight them. I just can't, you were supposed to take my side and yo...u....I...no... "
I was sobbing uncontrollably, I just felt my chest tighten and when he tried to touch me, I pulled away. I wiped my tears, then composed myself;
" You know the worst part?, while I was crying myself to sleep, you were busy fucking her. That's the part.... that's what hurts the most"
" I am in....way over my head"
Khathu" Listen to me!"
Me" It's too late for that"