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"so," chan started, slouching back in the chair of jeongin's dining room. he had that kind of side-smile that, although jeongin found very attractive through all those four years, was on the way to becoming unsettling. maybe because they were studying. "do you already know the irregular verbs?"

jeongin glanced down at his textbook laid out on the table. it was sprawled open in a random page, so his attempt to peak at whatever the fuck chan was asking him about was fruitless.

"uh..." jeongin dragged, "they are... past tense? indicative? future?"

he decided to shut up before he said something truly humiliating. they had been studying for 45 long minutes, and jeongin could not see any bit of improvement. his mind drifted a lot. his fingers tapped on the hardwood table a lot. his attention was on anything else but the subject.

god he was turning into hyunjin.

jeongin quickly willed the thought away before a certain boy's face could materialize in his head. the guilt was eating him alive from inside out, tiny maggots with loud laughs and dramatic behaviour, chewing his sanity.

he heard chan chuckle. jeongin turned his head to him, cheeks flushed in embarrassment. chan was the last person to ever make fun of him, but his english skills were a joke. why was he even putting up with him?

chan leaned forward, taking hold of the textbook and leafing through it until the dreadful chart labelled IRREGULAR VERBS was on full display.

he pointed a finger at one of the rows, "you see, irregular verbs are the ones who don't follow a pattern. so instead of going like ask, asked, or lie, lied, as i explained you earlier, you'll go more like begin, begun, began."

jeongin muttered something of an acknowledgement.

chan kept on, "or burn, burnt," he leaned closer, finger tracing the words on the page, "bite, bit, bitten," ice-cold fingers crept on jeongin's bare thighs, hot breath fanning over his cheek. chan was way too close, "hold, held," a harsh squeeze, "holding."

jeongin got up suddenly, the loud sound of his chair screeching over the floor as it moved back with the abrupt movement mixing with jeongin's wavering breaths. he stared at chan, who looked incredibly sorry.

"i-- i didn't--" chan looked slightly frightened, as if jeongin was on his way to kick him out of the house. maybe... he should? that was extremely inappropriate! but, still, wasn't jeongin, like, in love with chan for almost half a decade? wasn't he supposed to like it? a month or two ago he'd be melting on his feet, but now, with the whole hyunjin stuff...

ugh! that wasn't supposed to happen! no, no, no! jeongin did not plan it that way. the roles were sort of switched there, and it was very upsetting!

how did he become repelled by chan's touch when he had kissed hyunjin just hours ago? shouldn't that be the other way around? but chan was seriously giving him the hibbie jibbies lately... maybe it was a sign halloween was coming.

gulping back a frustrated scream, jeongin pondered his options: there was no future with hyunjin, that was a fact. not only the other had not uttered a single word about whatever was happening with them, but was also too silly for his own good. chan, on the other side, was mature and smart, and he himself was making the advances! despite the fact that jeongin had been silently pining for him since forever.

with shaky breaths, jeongin took his seat back. chan eyed him with a cautious expression, as if jeongin was a wild animal, easily frightened.

jeongin mustered a smile at him, "i don't mind," he said with an embarrassed laugh, and saw surprise spread through chan's face when he took the older's hand and placed over his thigh.

chan gave it a squeeze, and went back to teach him about things he couldn't pay attention to.

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