Bittersweet Tragedy | | Draco Malfoy

Secrets and Proudness

"I don't need this anymore. I'm over you Draco Malfoy. I don't need you." I picked up his hand and put it in his hand

"Y/N.." I opened my mouth to speak before he cut me off "Don't you dare. You are so...so... I don't even know who you are Y/N! You used to be an emotional girl with a beautiful laugh. That's gone now and I know it's my fault but you can't blame everything on me. It's not the letters or the boys or even the necklace. When it comes down to it, you are in control of everything that happened. You let Lee use you, you let Umrbridge carve that stupid" his voice shook a little when he said stupid "the stupid message into your hand, you let yourself shut down You did that and what do you have to show for it?"

I looked up at the blonde boy who towered me " I have Neville, and luna, and everyone else who isn't you." I said and ripped another photo off the wall "that's who you are Malfoy. An egotistical, fucking self-righteous, prick" I said and pointed to the photo. It was of my mom and his, but in the background, it was him yelling at me as I was on the ground "so yeah, I may not know who I am, but at least I know I'm nothing like you"

He pushed me against the wall. He opened his mouth to say something but all I could see was the hurt behind those eyes. Those big grey eyes.

"That's not who I am," he said, he sounded strong but below the surface was someone broken

"Then who are you?" I said quietly

"I'm Draco Lucius Malfoy. Son of Lucius Malfoy. I love constellations. I was a seeker but quit when I thought I wasn't enough. I made the biggest mistake of my life when I shoved my only friend to the ground because I feared she was turning into me" he said and held my waist

I shivered at his touch "then why isn't the Draco I saw five minutes ago? How come that isn't the Draco Harry or Hermonie or Ron sees?"

"that's not me." he said quietly and let me go "you know that. I'm done with this conversation. Don't repeat anything said here."

I heard the door close and I slid down the wall. I watch as the room morphed around me, it looked like my childhood room. It was blue, my bed had a niffler on it, all around my bed were scribbles. I put my head down and cried softly.

I felt someone sit next to me on the floor. I looked over to see Draco. "I-I thought you-"

"I came back, I thought you would've followed me out, but when you didn't I realized I didn't trust you to be alone in this room," he said

I sniffled and put my head back down "Leave me alone" I said quietly. He lifted my head and looked into my eyes. He held my cheek and wiped my tear away with the pad of his thumb

"You are not what your dad says. You are not what Lee says. You are..." he quieted down I laid my head down on my knees again

"Just leave me alone Draco," I said quietly "my dad was right, all I am is a disappointment, or, in your words, a wuss." I sniffled

He suddenly got up "Get up." he said. I looked up and shook my head. "You'll know I'll make you anyways," he said

I got up and he grabbed my hand. He sat on the bed against the headboard and sat me next to him. "Can we pretend we don't hate each other for a second?" he said quietly. I was silent for a second and nodded

"Whatever I say in here, stays in here. Understood?" he said, I nodded

"I don't hate you Y/N. I hate the way you let people walk all over you. You only fought against me and when you stopped it...broke my heart. It felt like I was seven all over again and then when we were at the astronomy tower I thought I was going to lose you again." his voice wavering "I can't lose you again. I'm sorry. I just...." I laid my head on his shoulder

"D-do you remember when my dad stopped talking to me when I was eleven?" I said quietly and he shook his head "when I was eleven and sorted into Ravenclaw my dad sent me a note telling me he was "proud" but he hasn't sent me a letter since then. I know he loves me but I just... I want to feel it. I feel like I'm always searching for love. I'm always fighting just for a little bit in return" I said, a tear falling down my face

"I...I don't even know why I'm telling you this. I can't tell anyone to they'll think I don't have a right to be sad since I 'at least have a dad' and I don't know. I feel like sometimes it's me against the world" I said quietly.

"I know how you feel. My dad never sends me letters. Ever since I failed to be friends with Harry he is always so disappointed in me" he said. I sat up and faced him.

"Draco...we're fucked up," I said

He laughed, that beautiful laugh, "we really are" he smiled, I laid back on the headboard "don't laugh okay?" he said quietly

I nodded "that hug you gave me..." he said

I looked at him "sorry I just-"

"No, don't apologize. I just...I missed your hugs" he said quietly. I missed his hugs as well.

All of a sudden he had one arm behind me and I was in his arms. I melted into his hug. The smell of spearmint and cologne. He stopped hugging me suddenly. I sighed sadly as the loss of touch

"I shouldn't have sorry-"

I cut him off by hugging him back. I could feel him relax beneath me.

It reminded me of when we were little. Whenever I was sad he would hug me until I stopped crying and vice versa.

"Hey, Draco..."

"Yeah," he said, still in my hug

"I missed you. It's fine if you-"

"No, I do. I missed my best friend" he said

I turned slightly red and put my head on his chest

"Are you blushing" he teased

"No," I said and laughed

We were in there for a while, laughing about everything. Now and then I saw him gazing into my eyes.

"Y/N. We...we have to keep this secret. I'm sorry-"

"No...I understand." I got up "have to keep up your rep," I said and headed for the door.

He grabbed me "Oh no you don't," he said and put me on the bed and held my wrist above my head "that's not why. it's just.. our parents. They'd be mad," he said and released his grip and sat next to me.

"You're right..." I said quietly "can...can you just stay here for a little bit?"

He nodded and laid back a little. I laid my head on his chest. He braided my hair or the top half. It was awful, but he seemed to have fun doing it so I was quiet. I yawned and slowly blinked. I could feel myself falling asleep.

"Draco I'm going to.."

"It's fine. We can just stay here until morning," he said quietly

I put my head back down and he continued braiding my H/C hair.

He hummed quietly as he played with my hair. I fell asleep to his soft hums and his heartbeat.

Word count: 2586