VI

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"JIN!!!" y/n yells and runs, jumping into said boys arms.

it had been about 6 days since you had last seen jin. his family had gone on their typical vacation, and you hadn't been able to tag along. the other boys of the group slowly join the two of you, hugging where they felt necessary.

"hi y/n!" he spins you around in a small circle, quickly pecking your forehead. you grin up at him, a light blush covering your cheeks. you feel an elbow in your side, jimin smirking at you.

you see, while jin has been your best friend since forever, jimin was the one you trusted with your number one secret. the one that included crushing on your 5 best friends. the only thing he didn't know was that he was also included.

this secret was something you had grown to accept as just that. a secret. something you could never release. the ONLY place you stored that information other than your heart was your journal, hidden beneath your mattress in your own bedroom. you and the boys shared a four-bedroom apartment, two people in each room.

you're now 17, half way through your final year of high school. the boys have been by your side ever since you met the rest 5 years ago. your group has been inseparable. you've done everything together. birthdays, holidays, graduations. every milestone done with your boys.

your first day was filled with anxiety, having only two classes with jin, the rest having graduated already. every night was spent doing homework or studying, the boys begging you for attention. but you pushed through for just a bit longer, knowing you had to graduate to spend more time with them.

that night, the boys aside from jin were working pretty late. jin was cooking dinner. you used this time to write in your journal about your day. this page had nothing about your feelings for the boys, yet you still felt very defensive over the journal.

you feel your eyes getting heavy. you close your journal, your pen in the page. you can't quite remember where it lands, but you're out as soon as the cover is shut.

quiet breathing is heard from outside your door in the hallway. jungkook is there, peeking in, having been sent to get you for dinner. all of the boys were home now, currently changing and getting ready for dinner.

a smile graces jungkook's face, lightly moving in the room to tuck you in and kiss your forehead. he eyes quickly catch the journal. curiously, he grabs it. there's no name on the cover, so he peeks inside where your pen is. he chuckles softly at the words on the page. something about a bitch of a teacher.

he flips a few pages back, gasping softly at this one. written at the top, right under the date were the words

"i'm so stupid. how could i fall for 7 people and not have the heart to choose."

he quickly shuts the cover, staring down at it, he rushes quietly out of your room and into the kitchen where the boys were chatting.

"jeez, jungkook, we were worried you got lost in there! where is y/n?" it was hoseok.

jungkook looks like he's seen a ghost, staring at the book in his hands.

"what? read a stephen king novel again?" the boys all laugh. jungkook clears his throat, opening back to the page, setting it on the table.

the laughs quickly die down, everyone taking turns reading what's in the pages. nobody knows what to say.

until a few moments later, light footsteps leading into the room. jungkook leaving the room had accidentally slammed the door, waking you. you walk straight to the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water, taking a small sip.

"dinner smells so good, jinnie!" you turn to face the boys. some are staring at you with wide eyes, others refuse to make eye contact.

you glance at each of them confused until your eyes land at jin. he's staring into his hands, so your eyes follow. he's holding your journal.

your journal.

you gasp, freezing for a moment, then jin's eyes raise, meeting your tearful ones. you rush out of the room, running back into yours and locking the door. you grab your backpack and a small duffel bag from the top of your closet.

"y/n! please open up! we need to talk!"

you fill the bag with a few days worth of clothes, your phone charger, a few toiletries from the bathroom and anything else you can fit. you slip the backpack on your back, duffel bag slung over your shoulder. you sneak through the other side of the connected bathroom through jimin and hoseok's room. you run into the kitchen, snatch the journal and book it out of the front door.

you run as fast as you can to the bus stop. not taking the time to tie your shoes. you hide behind the wall of the awning, doing your absolute best not to be seen. you get on the next bus to your parents house, leaning against the window. as you pull down the street, you can see jin looking around for you

sure, maybe you're overreacting, but can you really say that? the boys you've fallen in love with have gotten ahold of the only place you safely vented all of your feelings. you shake your head, tears welling up in your eyes again.

you grab your headphones and turn on the most upbeat music you can think of, trying to drown out the hole in your chest where your heart used to be. you switch your phone onto do not disturb, then shoot your mom a text to leave the door open.

"hey mama, i need you to leave the door open. i'm a bit homesick, so i'm on my way!"

you hope she can't catch on to the sadness in the words.

as soon as you get to the stop at the corner of your parents street, you trudge your way there, grateful that the door is unlocked. you close the door behind you, locking it and sliding off your shoes. you creep down the hallway to your bedroom, dropping your bags and looking down at the journal, throwing it to the floor.

a knock on your door brings you back, "y/n... i have a feeling this is more than some homesickness, but i won't push it. come have some dinner."

your mom leads you into the kitchen where your favorite meal sits on the table.

your eyes tear up again and you grab your mom into a hug, thanking her for her thoughtfulness.

after dinner, you shower and decide to go to bed, promising your mom to talk in the morning.

~
hey guys! i finally got around to updating again, my apologies for the wait. i took the time i needed to heal, so i'm back (: here's a semi-long chapter that's been in the works since june on and off. i have the next one mapped out so it should be out this week!

thank you all for the patience and for 20k reads?! holy shit you guys are awesome. i love u all already. pls introduce yourselves so i can get to know my new friends!!

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