Overthinking Confessions (ishimondo)

Chapter 6- Something's Off Today

TW: mention of death

As the shower's cold water poured down Kiyotaka's pale skin, worrying thoughts clouded his head
He got out shivering from the bathroom fan, then dressed himself

Ishimaru grabs his stuff and leaves to Hope's Peak

That day in the halls, Leon merges himself between two of his fellow classmates and starts flirting with Sayaka, "Sayaka darling, who needs some loser hope boyfriend when there's frankly the most cool guy in front of you" he smirked, ignoring Makoto's presence
"For the last time Leon, Makoto and I aren't even dating, we're just good friends"
With that Leon moved his attention to Makoto, he pushed Sayaka to the side, "Naegi.. right? Never paid attention to you before, but you're a very attractive young man" he laughs, but it was truly, a genuine remark
Makoto got all flustered and Sayaka pushed Leon back as revenge before telling him off, "I give you music lessons you can't push ME around"
"Wait I was joking please don't be mad, I'm very thankful for your help I swear" he begged
She laughed and said she wasn't serious, they then entered the class and continued their chat in there
Kiyotaka had only not gone in yet, because he was waiting for Mondo, the teacher tells the kids in the hall there are five minutes left and Taka was going to let himself in and wait for Mondo inside when he heard his name being called, Mondo ran up and put his hand on Ishimaru's shoulder, "hey bro"
"Goodmorning Owada, you're early for a change"
"Yeah, well I said I would see you, so I didn't wanna seem like I was ditching my promise"
The day continues, and everyone goes to their respected classes

Luckily Ishimaru was able to focus on his school work for the most part, but once school was almost done for the day, his mind started to race again, he paid close attention to Owada, and once the bell rang, he grabbed his items, and followed Mondo out of the room
Just like his dream, Mondo was heading upstairs, Kiyotaka called out "Hey, Owada, wait up!"
No response.

Kiyotaka stopped for a minute.. this couldn't be like that, that was a dream, and this is reality, of course it was different
He quickly made his way over, making sure not to run, and eventually got close again, "Mondo?"
Mondo took one of his headphones out and looked behind him, "Oh hey.. Ishi"
"Where are you headed?" He asked trying to delay Mondo's walk
"Just to the roof to clear my head" Mondo looked saddened, Kiyotaka gave a worrying glance
"Can I join you?"
"Oh... sure" he gave a light hearted smile before going back to his normal expression

They reached their destination and sat on the roof, "is something wrong by any chance?"
Mondo looked over, "why do you ask?"
"You seemed bummed out.. and I couldn't help but worry about something else"
"Something... else?"
"A dream. You died in it, in an unpleasant way and I wasn't sure if it had meant something so I decided to ask you if you had any bad thoughts.. sorry if that's weird"
"Not at all. You're right I have kind of lost my interest in today, I thought maybe this would be the year but I'm still weak.."
Mondo took a long pause, dropping his head, "Today is the day of my brother's death"
"Mondo.. that's terrible, I had no clue today held that type of meaning"
"It's alright, I was gonna head to his grave, which is why I guess you could say I've been a bit distant today"
"I could accompany you!"
Mondo stares at him, the corners tugged into a small smile "that would be nice. Thanks"

"We'll have to walk.. I didn't bring it because of the fear if you understand that"
"I do" Kiyotaka answered

The wind kept their hair out of their face as they peacefully walked, creating small talk

---

Finally, they arrive at Daiya's grave, although it was a calming setting around them, neither could help but feel tense. The lost of a loved one and the sight of a grieving friend

Mondo kneeled down, placing a flower he kept in his jacket on the grave, there were a couple of withered flowers from last year, he tossed them into the nearest trash can before sitting back down in front of the grave
"Do you want to talk about it, I'm willing to listen if you do" His best friend offered.
Taka didn't know how else to provide comfort as he didn't have siblings, let alone a dead one

"A few years back, he was hosting his retirement party. I challenged him to one last race, I wanted to prove that I was better or even just as good as him. Wanted it so much that I acted reckless"
He looked up at the sky, "He saw that I was going to get hurt.. and moved in the way of the truck. It- it hit him, and I was full of panic and he seemed so composed, and even told me to take care of the gang for him.."

Kiyotaka sat beside him, still listening
"But I'm just a screw up.. the gang would hate me if they knew the truth, how I killed my brother so I could be better!" His voice became louder at the end, and tears rolled down his face
"Mondo, you didn't kill anyone.."
"But he should be alive, and still would be if I could just accept that I'd always be in his shadow. Fuck, I still am even AFTER his death"
He placed his head in the palms of his hands
Ishimaru rubbed circles on Mondo's back, "you can't change what happened in the past, and I know you blame yourself, but I doubt he'd want you to"
"He must hate me, I mean, I survived and he didn't, why wouldn't he blame me for that"
"He risked his life for you" Kiyotaka stared into Owada's lilac eyes and wiped the tears shedding from them, "he loved you, and he would be so proud of who you are. You're one of the best people I know, and sure I didn't know your brother well, but I think he'd feel the same"

Mondo lightly took Ishi's hand off of his face and wiped away his tears, he held Kiyotaka's hand between both of his shaking ones
"Thanks" he said quietly, leaning his friend's shoulder
"No problem.." the smaller boy added his free hand on Mondo's still shaking hands and lightly rubbed the other man's knuckles with his thumb, a tactic his father used on him to help him calm down when he was overwhelmed

[AN: I feel this is a sucky update but honestly I have loads of different things I want to add, but it'll have to wait if I want to have it make sense
(Two days later: i tweeked with the first five chapters.. probably still crappy but I tried)]