Irreplaceable [h.s]

Chapter 7

"But I missed you more than I thought I would
And I'll use you as a warning sign
That if you talk enough sense then you'll lose your mind
And I found love where it wasn't supposed to be
Right in front of me
Talk some sense to me"

* * * *

One month later

It's been exactly one month since I found Harry's journal and I still have yet to figure out why he left it here. He has yet to respond to the message I sent him right after I found it. I'm not surprised though. It's been a little over a month since he left and he hasn't even read any of the texts I sent him. Then again, he could of just turned off the read receipts. I just don't get why he won't even answer one of my texts. It's so unlike him. Anytime we were together and he sensed something was off or I was upset, he would jump to talk to me and comfort me.

Now It's like he doesn't care anymore.

I can try and text him all I want but nothing is going to change if he doesn't answer me. He's the reason why I've almost completely stopped texting him this past week. I couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't text him, praying that I would for some reason get a response, just to be let down for the hundredth time when I received no reply. It didn't do anything good for me which is why I stopped. Also maybe because I hoped that if he saw that I stopped messaging, something would click for him in his head and make him realize how bad he fucked up and that would get him to text me.

There hasn't been a single time that I didn't feel my heart skip a beat when I hear a bing come from my phone, signaling someone texted me. I then started to think about what I would truly do if he were to ever text or call me. To be realistic, I'd probably just freeze up even though I have a thousand things I wish to say to him. I would either freeze up and be silent or I would start crying. Or maybe even both. I have no idea. I wouldn't know unless it happened, which I'm almost one hundred percent sure it won't.

He seems very insistent on not responding to me.

Sadly, I was a bit distracted for a little while with the court case that happened about two weeks ago. The one that happened because of my father and Harry getting into that fight. And the lead to it behind about me when he came over and assaulted me. I was so beyond scared for it. I knew when I pressed those charges against my father that it would really suck not having Harry with me when it happened. Thankfully though, I had Sage and Zoe to comfort me. I don't know what I would of done without them.

The day before court I kept overthinking it and thinking that nothing was going to come out of it and that he would get no punishment for what he did. That I'd get no justice. Sage had to keep reminding me that I would get no justice if I didn't try. And because I did, my father ended up getting five years in jail and 125,000 dollars in fines. I've also put a restraining order against him so when he does get out of jail in five years time, he can't come near me without a legal consequence.

I'm happy that I got some form of justice and he finally got a punishment after all these years and all the hell he's put me through. It was hard but I finally got it. The night we got back, I stayed over at Sage's. Sage and Zoe and I all drank wine and ate ice cream out of a celebration. It felt good. For a moment there I completely forgot about Harry and the pain he was bringing me. I was happy because I was with my two bestfriends in the entire world and I had just gotten justice for the abuse my father had put me through for years.

Then around three in the morning when I laid in bed, finally getting ready to go to sleep, all of that vanished. It was just me and my torturous thoughts again. The thoughts I can never escape. Harry begun consuming my mind like usual and that pain in my chest when I thought of him returned. Tears started to run down my checks before I could even realize I was crying. And just like that, my good day was ruined. The day I was supposed to only feel joy for what I had accomplished was ruined because  I thought of him and what he did.