Dear Elizabeth

Monsters: Becoming One

Dear Elizabeth,

I've been thinking a lot lately,

Thoughts which are slowly driving me crazy,

Emotions that are making me go insane,

Of my own past, I've become a loyal slave,

I've become nothing,

I'm not who I used to be,

I look in the mirror and gasp,

Who have I become?

The world is stopping as I fall on my knees,

I'm screaming for help,

But no one hears my pleas,

I am useless, I am worthless,

I am selfish, I am voiceless,

I've been playing with fire, and I'm expecting third degree burns,

But it doesn't matter, there's nowhere to turn,

I push the people I love away,

And it's only because I'm afraid,

I'm so sorry, Liz, I really am,

You've been battling monsters all your life,

And here I stand, also being a monster in disguise,

I've been horrible to you,

The cuts on my leg are nothing but proof,

I was tired of taking every wound to the heart,

So I decided to show myself such pain by creating physical scars,

I can't stand the thought of ever coming out,

I'm afraid to lose everything I have,

Everything I've ever worked for, everything I can call mine,

I'd rather live like this, hiding in the shadows and being a monster of my own,

Killing you painfully, and giving a slow death to your poor soul,

Than to have everything taken from me,

To lose all my chances, whatever those chances might be,

I'm a coward, for I fear my own being.

Once again, I'm really sorry Liz,

But for now, this is how things are ought to be.

Yours,

Liz

A/N: If you or anyone you know is struggling with self-injury or suicidal thoughts, DON'T IGNORE IT. There is help out there because you are not alone. There are many people out there who truly love you and want your love.

The following websites are of many different associations who can help you understand and battle what you're going through:

Www.nshn.co.uk

Www.selfinjury.org

Www.selfinjury.com

Www.actforyouth.net

Www.twloha.com

You are NOT alone <3