Wonderful | wicked | book 2/3

Nessa

Why did I agree to this?
I want nothing to do with this man, whether he's Elphabas father or not.
And he's here, sat in front of me, smiling as I check through student reports and records.
"Nessa," he mumbles after a long period of silence, "are we even going to talk?"
I sigh deeply, and await the disappointment in his tone.
I push myself away from the desk and into my bedroom, Albert follows slowly behind.
Hear a slight scraping noise on the floor, I spin myself around, just in time to see the door close.
"Can you put that back?" I ask impatiently, glaring down at the door stop that he so carelessly kicked away.
Albert looks down in shock, he props open the door and puts it back into place.

"It's quite cold," he chuckles emptily to himself,
"Right," I snap, wishing that I was wearing a thicker dress, "but the door has to stay open or else I can't get out the room"
I feel embarrassed admitting it, but the last time I tried to open the door, I almost fell out of my chair and that was before this stupid curse made me weak.
"If you needed to leave the room, I could always open it for you," Albert says meekly.
"I don't need your help." I grumble.
I smooth my skirt down around my lap and turn myself around to face my bed.
Albert walks over and sits on it, our eyes meet uncomfortably.
"Nessa, I don't want it to be like this between us," Albert says sadly "I want to help you."
I flash him a warning glare, I just want him to stop talking.
"Help me with what exactly?"
Albert leans closer to me, my immediate response is too pull away.
"With anything, if you need to talk I'm here." He looks into my eyes deeply, the air seems to run thin.
I can feel a headache coming on, but I don't do anything about it.

"Elphaba told me about what happened to your mother, Melena" he says calmly, I know he wants to help and get to know me but I don't want to drop my guard for a second.
For all I know, this could be phase two of Moiras plan.
"You don't know the half of it," I whisper "i ruined her, from the moment she fell pregnant with me, she knew something wasn't right."
Albert looks confused,
"Elphaba said Frexbar fed her milk flower, it made you come too soon and it..."
My head spins, full of rage, confusion and mostly headache.
"Stop it!" I shout "I don't want to hear it, I know I came out wrong, you think I'm not aware of that every minute of every day that I'm a burden to my family."
I push myself backwards, just wanting to escape.

"Elphaba showed me pictures of you as a baby, a child, she told me how Frex treated you."
I slam my hands down onto my arm rests, the soft velvety padding soaks up most of the sound.
"Stop criticising a dead man, he was still my father" I whimper, "he made mistakes but he loved me"
I'm crying now, large tears roll down my face and create tiny rivers across my cheeks.
I feel so stupid, I didn't want to cry in front of this man.
Albert takes off his grey top hat and holds it in his hands.
"Sorry," he mumbles defeatedly "I wasn't trying to upset you."
I turn my head away, facing the wall, trying to find something to focus on other than crying.
"But Nessa you need to talk to someone about this, you can't keep saying that it's okay, what he did to both of you wasn't okay."
I rest my elbow onto one of my arm rests, I place my head gently into my hand.
"When I was born I didn't cry, everyone else did" I begin, really to start crying again at any moment "father did, Elphaba did, the mourned Melena and they pitted me."
My voice is low and quiet, I don't want to shout anymore, I'm done being horrible.
"Doctors tried everything they could to get me to walk, when I was first born, my legs were all red and tangled." I darken my tone "disgusting."
Albert kneels next to me, he puts a hand on my shoulder but I don't look at him.
"Tell me more," he whispers gently, I contemplate continuing but I decide it's for the best.
He's Elphabas father, he best get to know me.
"A few months later, they looked normal but father knew that there was something wrong with me, many of our relatives just thought I was lazy, they never saw what I looked like when I was born and I think my father was perhaps a bit embarrassed."
I pause, not knowing wether or not to carry on, I feel horrible talking about him like this, but there's just so much to say.
"From the moment I was pronounced disabled Elphaba became my sole caretaker, my sole friend and my sole companion, and she rarely ever got the praise she deserved."
Albert stands up and walks around the room briskly, stretching his arms and sighing deeply.

I wait, silently for him to say somthing, all this reminiscing has made me loathsome of my legs again, I stare down at them, repulsed by there normality because deep down I know that they aren't.
"Thank you for telling me all this" Albert says after a while of silence.
I sit up and turn myself around, I look into his mind eyes,
"I'm sorry for shouting at you," I say truthfully, I really do feel bad, he didn't deserve it.
It's just me being awkward.
Albert leaves the room and steps back into the office, I follow him as quickly as I can, he walking through the pride and into the lounge area.
He sits down on the sofa and I park myself beside him.
I stroke my hands over my velvet dress, I own many of theses now, I leave my hands say comfortably in my lap.
It's been so long since I became unable to walk again, I can't remember what things felt like when they touched my legs.
It's quite disheartening.