Wonderful | wicked | book 2/3

Nessa

I don't feel good, there's this horrible feeling in my stomach, it feels like a knot that just keeps pulling tighter and tighter.
Despite this, I'm glad I'm back at Shiz.
I've not done any proper work since we got back earlier today, Dr Dillamomd is still worried about it, but I've been told my new assistants coming later to day.
Elphaba won't leave until she's here.
I'm sat in my governors chair, I hate looking at it but it is admittedly more comfy.
It just reminds me of who I was and who I never want to be again.

"Nessa," Elphaba suddenly calls from behind me, I turn myself around as fast as I can.
She's picked up that box again, the one with all the pictures in, my leg braces are still on the floor from when I threw them.
"Yes?" I call out, Elphaba beckons
me over.
I park myself beside my bed and Elphie sits on it, the box in her hands.
"I haven't looked at these in so long!" She exclaims joyously.
I can get distracted looking at them, my head is full of disaster.
Madame Morrible is on the loose, I don't think I've ever been more terrified of a single person.
But I can't live my life like that, I have to focus on the now and right now my sister wants to look at pictures.

I focus on an image of me from a long time ago, my hair is platted beautifully and my arm is in that sling I loathed so much.
"I remember this," I say, plucking the image from Elphabas hands, "god I was such an nightmare"
Elphaba laughs, she puts an arms around me, I look up into her eyes and reminisce about being kids again.
"Ness you were only little,"
"I was stupid," I say bluntly "I shouldn't have even gone near the stairs in the first place,"
Elphaba takes the picture away and closes the box.
"Do you remember the pain of breaking your arm?" Elphaba asks gently.
I roll my eyes,
"I remember being miserable that I couldn't push myself" I chuckle emptily.
I also remember father yelling at me but I don't mention it.
He yelled at Elphie so much more.

Suddenly there's a shout from the next office.
"Nessa, could you come here please," Dr Dillamomd calls.
I look up at Elphie and smile as she races over to hold the door open, Dr Dillamomd has the hinges changed so the door swings both ways.
I push myself into the office, followed by Elphaba.
Inside sits Dr Dillamomd at the desk and a young lady at the chair in front.
She has gorgeous tanned skin and curly brown hair that she's gathered up in a ponytail at the back of her head.
She smiles pleasantly at me, then looks startled at the sight of Elphaba who stands protectively behind me.

"Nessa, this is Harley" Dr Dillamomd says gesturing towards the woman, she waves at me cheerfully and I wave back.
"You and Harley chat in your room and me and Elphaba can catch up in here."
Elphaba pushes past me and Harley follows me back into my bedroom.
"Is that your sister?" She asks, her voice thick and creamy like melted chocolate.
I nod hesitantly.
Harley goes and sits on a chair that has been placed in the corner of my room.
"Tell me about yourself" she says sweetly.
I turn my head away from her.
"What rumors have you heard?" I say bluntly, "because my sister is nothing like they say and I've changed"
I can feel myself about to cry, but I stop myself.
I can't embarrass myself like this, I don't know why I'm being so defensive.

Harley smiles and crouches by my feet.
"I don't listen to rumours" she says lovingly, I feel myself unclench my hands from around my arm rests, I breath a deep sigh of relief.
"Now Nessa, what should I know about you?"
I think for a moment,
There's not many good things about me that spring to mind.
"I'm not sure," I mumble dumbly.
I feel like an idiot, she's trying her best and I can't even answer a simple question.
"How about I tell you something about me?" She suggests, I nod my head eagerly.
Harley scratches her head, searching for an idea and then her eyes light up.
"Well much like you Nessa, I have an older sister" she says, I listen intently "her name is dawn and I love her to pieces,"
I smile and look around the room.
I push myself over to where Elphaba left the box of pictures, I grab it and venture back over to Harley.
"Here," I say holding it out to her "I can't work out what to say so just look at these,"
Harley giggles but takes the box and begins to sort through the pictures.
As she's doing so she keeps making little gasping sound and cooing, like she's looking at a little kitten.
"You were so cute," she says after a while, "I was a nightmare, always so demanding and spoilt"
Harley laughs and sets the box down,
"Like you said, that's who you were, you've changed"
I hold out my hand and Harley takes it in hers, she smiles at me plesently.
"You know Nessa, I think I'm going to like this job."

Those words make my heart flutter.
Someone who's genuinely going to enjoy spending time with me and who didn't listen to the rumors.
She hasn't said a nasty word about Elphaba and seems to be genuinely understanding about that I've changed and feel awful about who I was.
I think Harley is going to make such a difference.
I'm so glad she's here and that she's so lovely.
"I'm really happy you think so," I gush "I do hope I'm not too tiresome for you"
Harley chuckles and pats me on the shoulder.
"Nessa you need to stop being so hard on yourself, Dr Dillamomd mentioned about you doing that" Harley says sincerely "you just have to believe in yourself."