"Who the fuck are you?" said the boy.
"Who the fuck are you?" countered Faith.
"I asked first."
"And I asked second."
There was a tense silence. And thenㅡ "James! There's a girl in your living room!"
***
When Faith Potter gets expelled from Beauxbat...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Faith walked into the boys' dorm, shoving the door open with her hip, with a stack of books in her arms. "Remus, come get your stupid books my arms are going to fall off." Hearing no response, she peered around the tower in her hands, and saw Sirius standing on his bed, James and Remus reclining on their own with an exasperated look on their faces. "What are you doing? Are we playing a game?"
"Yes," whimpered Sirius, "it's called we saw a big spider and we don't know where it went."
Faith immediately dropped the books and leaped onto Sirius' bed, but the instant she was off the floor he kicked her off with a scream when she'd accidentally brushed against his arm. As she fell backwards in what felt like slow-motion, she was surprised when she was caught under the arms and dragged onto another bed. "Woah, there," came Remus' voice through the sound of her heart thrumming in her ears, "Please don't break your neck in our room."
"Oh mon dieu, I almost fucking died," she gasped, crawling away from the edge of the bed and pressing herself into the headboard. "Fuck you, Black!"
"I thought you were the spider!" he argued weakly.
"You mean like the one on your shoulder?" said James casually, flicking a page in his book. The room was instantly filled with Sirius' and Faith's horrified shrieking and Remus watched the two jump around with disbelief and incredulity.
"Faith, why are you screaming?" asked Remus, judgement clear in his tone.
She stopped suddenly, seeming to realise there was nothing to scream about since the spider wasn't on her. When James had almost fallen off the bed from laughing so hard, she realised he'd been lying. "Solidarity," she answered solemnly, but she didn't let go of Remus' arm.
"Look, the spider won't hurt you," said James once he'd regained his breath, picking up a snitch from his bedside table and starting to play with it.
"It's hurting my heart!" snapped Sirius, and Faith nodded fervently in agreement.
"Why did I come here..." complained Faith, eyes darting over every exposed surface in the room. She suddenly looked up at the ceiling and squeaked, slapping a hand over her mouth in terror. "...Oh my God, it has friends." Sirius let out an aggrieved sound, and his eyes never left the three unwanted guests hanging off their ceiling.
Faith moved her arms and dragged Remus up to use him as a human shield, but he fought against her restraint because he wanted to get up and collect his books from the floor. "Get them later," she cried, "you need to protect me first!"
"I'm not going to be your meat shield ㅡ you can't put me in a choke hold and think that will stop me from moving!" he sighed, standing up, and Faith scrambled to wrap her legs around his torso to keep from touching the ground.
