Thorns Of The Past.

Regrets, Apologies, Chances.

If you don't let the past die and don't regret about what you did, then it won't let you live and you won't get the chance you desperately need!

~next morning, too early, Blue River Pack, house~

Gabriel's pov

"What do you mean Becky is alive and you have two kids together?" Kaitlyn asks gasping ready to break into sobbing and I stiffen awkwardly.

It is too early in the morning and I am in my room! I came back to my pack yesterday too late in the afternoon and I have told nobody about Becky and our kids.

I haven't told my parents, because I want Kaitlyn with me and I want to take things slowly, not to mention that I feel ashamed and I don't want them to go to Evan's pack and pressure the whole thing even more. And also, I haven't told my best friends here, Declan that is my Beta and Joel, my Gamma, because I am not ready, I can't talk about it so easily, it is a lot to take and I wanted to tell Kaitlyn first.

You see, she may be younger than me, but she is wise and she loves Becky like she is her real sister. Becky had been dying for her as well and only Kaitlyn can understand how I feel. I need her here, she is distant from the day Becky run away and I have been respecting her wish all these years but now I am desperate for her support! I know she loves me, but I have also hurt her with what I did and I must make it up to her and everybody else!

"I am not joking, I told you! I found her to Evan's pack, she has been there with Claire and Ryker for the last 12 years!" I whisper and wipe my tears with shaking hands.

I still can't believe I found her and we have two kids together! It feels like a dream and it hurts like hell that I have caused them so much pain! I know I can't complain for them not wanting me, it is my fault and I have to try as much as I can to make them give me a chance, but I can't stop feeling desperate and devastated!

What broke my heart the most was what Claire told me yesterday when we were alone in the meeting room... She believes I can't love her, because she is like Becky and she thinks I never loved her and I just used her and I know this is what it looked like, but I never used Becky!

I don't know how I marked Michelle, I am getting crazy the more I am thinking about it! Something is too weird, my memory is playing games with me!

Anyway, what matters is that I can't feel Claire is so much pain, I need a chance with her, Becky and Ryker and I am ready to make everything right, but not only with them...

I have Kaitlyn, my parents and Hayley that I have to talk to as well! I need to change, ask for their forgiveness and become the Gabriel I used to be before I lose Becky!

I listen to her crying and I run my free hand through my messy hair. I was sure she would react this way, when I thought Becky had died, she was close to have depression, she had melancholy for months, we were worried for her and I am glad she had her mate to support her! Dillan loved her from the first moment they met and she is a fantastic Luna next to him! He is her rock and she is happy with him and their two kids, their pack is strong and everything is peaceful in their life.

I can't feel her suffering, it's a torture for me! I have only one sibling, her and she means the world to me although he hates me after what I did and I don't blame her, I hate myself as well and maybe more than all of them do together.

"I..." I begin and pause to take a sharp breath as I feel I am running out of oxygen.

"I need you here to tell our parents about it... I can't do it alone, I am sorry I am asking from you to come here so suddenly, but... I need... You!" I say with some pauses and she stops crying after less than five seconds.