trauma [m.s]

xxiii.

- - -
my sister used to say that for a surgeon, a day without death is a rare gift.
- - -

standing in a row, mark, derek and richard are on the edge of derek's land, staring out at the view of seattle before them.

"i tried to change... turn over a new leaf," mark tells them. "but the leaf isn't turning."

"you weren't ready to change," richard shrugs. "and that's okay. adele wanted me to change, to retire. well, i'm still the chief, and this weekend, i'm moving back home."

"does adele know that?" derek turns to richard with a raised brow.

"she'll be fine," richard confidently waves his hand in dismissal. "she was wrong. i was right. and now we're-"

"doing it like bunnies," mark says before shaking his head and muttering to himself. "i can't change. i can't change. i can't change."

"be who you are," richard encourages. "i am who i am. a man."

"a man," mark nods to himself whilst derek shakes his head at the two of them. "i have a way about me. i'm a man who is who he is. i have a right to be that man."

"i'm not gonna say anything. nope, no judgement," derek clicks his tongue, then clears his throat as he looks to mark and richard, in turn. "but the man you are slept with my wife. and you. you've been on my land for six months. but i got no judgement."

"i'm gonna miss living on this land," richard sighs.

"it is a beautiful piece of land," mark agrees, wishing that he could be the type of man that would buy a piece of land and build a house for chloe. but he wasn't that kind of man. and chloe, well, as far as mark was concerned, chloe content with their current set up. and for the most part, so was he.

"wanna buy it?" derek offers and the two other men turn to him with creased brows.

"you can't sell this land," richard protests.

"you have blueprints," mark reminds him. "this is your living room window. the house that derek built."

"yeah, well, that's over," derek shrugs. "i'm thinking about getting a place in town."

"but you love this land," richard argues.

"this land and ferry boats are who you are," mark adds.

"a man can change. i'm selling the land," derek nods to confirm his decision. "and ferry boats... crash."

- - -
every day we face death. every day we lose life.
- - -

in one of the on call rooms, mark is panting as he hovers over a moaning chloe, pressing his lips firmly against hers before dragging them away and ghosting them of her collarbones.

"it's just you, me and arizona... and we're grabbing you," mark smirks down at her.

"uh-huh," chloe moans. she wasn't even listening to his words, but she was still in a euphoric state because of his touch.

"and then you're naked. you're so hot... and naked," he pants as chloe's pager begins to buzz on the nightstand beside her. "and then arizona starts kissing you."