You say you're a child of God and you obey him, but you say every bad word known to kind, you judge everyone because they don't fit your expectations. You say you're a child of God but you continue to talk about other people like its nothing. You say you're a child of God but you still go to church every Sunday to wash out your sins.
You say you love her, but you still flirt with every brunette blue eyed girl you see. You say you love her but you sit here and treat her like shit, because you know she loves you. You say you love her but you stay on the couch eating chips while she goes out and works. You say you love her but you take your hand every night and strike it across her face. You swear you love her but while your lips are moving across another's she sits there waiting for you.
You say you have big dreams but you continue to sit there doing nothing. You say you wanna do something with your life but you sit there with a cigarette hanging from your lips. You say you wanna be somebody when you still work at the cashiers, not even showing up half the time. You say you want to go and be somebody and do something along with being somebody but love, you're just another sad face in a big world... Lost and lonely.
You tell me that there is no such thing as a flaw but you continue to point them out. You tell me I have black heads filling up my nose, like I don't see them. You tell me that stretch marks are taking over the side of my belly, I look at them everyday. You tell me that my nose is to big with my glasses on... I need to see. You tell me that my hair is dead.. I straighten my hair because you said it looked frizzy... I'm sorry? You told me my outfits were repeating so I got new clothes... You told me I was changing. Do I not make you happy? You continue to tell me there is no such thing as a flaw, but you didn't say there is no such things as flaws.
I remember how he held me close to him, looking into my eyes. He told me they shone brighter then the moon, so I kept staring in his direction. He told me he liked my sweater, so I wore it all the time.. washing it only once in a while. He told me he loved my scent so I wore your perfume. He told me he liked the way my hand felt on his, so I continued to put lotion on them. Everything he liked I tried to do.. It wasn't worth it.
When I used to sit up in my room you tried explaining to me that everything leaves, I didn't understand. So you cradled me up in your arm and told me how the sun loved the moon so much it risk it's life for a whole night, just so the moon could see how beautiful everything is. You told me if you really loved something you had to let it go...If it loved you it would come back. I'm still waiting for you. You told me love is a word and people throw it around like its nothing, You told me you loved me... was it nothing then? You told me you have to be married when you wanna have sex.. but you continued to stand at the end of the streets. You sat by my side that night and held my wrist up high, rubbing your thumb across all forty-eight. "Don't do it again." you whispered.
With my wrist marked up with exactly seventy-six and counting, I still think about that night. You told me you would come back... I leave the door unlocked, just in case you decide to show up. Everything we did lives in a box on a top shelf, it's by its self. The picture you threw at me sits in the corner where the glass is shattered and the picture facing towards the fan. Tell me something? Are you better? because I'm not.
My friend I love and miss you I'll see you soon.
