The next day was the fall festival. I wasn't really sure where I stood with Cody after the last nights conversation, but I was hoping we could get some time to really talk about things that day.
When I got there, I saw him on the swings with Sarah. My heart swelled up with the sight of him and I felt a wave of warmth flow over my body. I took a deep breath and approached them.
Cody looked up at the sound of my footsteps on the gravel. When his eyes met mine he got off the swing and pulled me into another hug. My heartbeat accelerated and I took a deep breath as I was pressed against his chest. I breathed in the combination of wonderful smells and tried to brand them into my memory. I could get an actually high of the scent of him.
Taking a hint, Sarah pretended to hear another one of her friends calling her and left us alone. I sat down next to Cody in the seat she left vacant.
We say there in silence for a few minutes until he finally broke it and asked "What are you thinking about?"
"You," I said quietly, and I felt my cheeks flush with warmth.
He reached over and lifted my chin up so that I was looking into his eyes instead of the ground.
"Why the long face? Cheer up. Have I ever told you how awesome you are?" he laughed and swiftly pulled me out of the swing and threw me onto his back in one fluid motion. Some part of my brain was impressed by how strong he must have been, but the rest of me was just thinking how close our bodies were, and how thankful I was that I had an excuse to cling to him for an extended period of time. We laughed together and he ran me over to some of the games. We stayed there for hours, playing stupid games and just enjoying each other. I couldn't remember the last time I had that much fun. Every moment I spent with him was precious to me and I treasured spending so much time with him.
We never actually said anything about what our relationship was, but I didn't want to bug him about it. Right now, I just needed Cody any way I could take him. I figured our relationship would figure itself out. I loved him and he obviously had feelings for me, and that was enough for now. I hoped with everything in me that it would last.
When I went home that afternoon I was astounded to realize the drastic change in my feelings from being around him all day to leaving him. It was ridiculous. It was as if the very air around me was suffocatingly gloomy. A part of me was happier than I ever had been before that I had someone like that, but another part was just always downcast when I wasn't with him. That's the only place I ever wanted to be.
All I did was sit in my room the rest of the day and watch TV, counting down the time until I would be with him again. Saying to myself over and over "only 40 more hours Leslie, only 40 more hours."
