The Safe House

Chapter 10

I laid in bed for what seemed like forever before I finally let my eyes close and took in sleep.

I woke up screaming and in a panic. I had another nightmare. The boys came running into my room. I was trying to calm my breathing.

"Are you okay?" They asked.

"Yeah, I just had a nightmare. I'm fine. Go back to bed."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah." I said.

The boys trudged back to their rooms except for Jason. He came and sat on the edge of the bed. "Are you okay?" He asked

"Yeah, I'm fine." I tried to shrug it off. He saw right through me.

"Tell me what it's about."

I debated for a minute whether I should tell him or not. "The beginning is always blurry, but it starts to get clear when they were carrying me out of the house and I saw my Dad's body......" I dove into what happens in the dream and by the end, I told him everything. What happens in the dream and what actually happened. He knows everything now and I just hope that he can keep a secret. My face was soaked in tears and he was snuggled up to me trying to comfort me. I could barely catch my breath I was crying so hard. Telling him about everything was like going through it all over again.

The next morning, I woke up in Jason's arms. My head and my eyes hurt from crying so much last night. He was still asleep. I just laid in his arms. Until the door came crashing open. It was Kenna. She was trying to get up on the bed. I was afraid she was going to hurt herself, so I reached over the side and picked her up.

She whispered, "Hi M!"

"Hi" I whispered back. Then She crawled over to Jason and tried to wake him up. I giggled at her. She finally poked his shoulder over and over until he woke up.

"Good morning Kenna." He groaned in his morning groggy voice. I got up and went to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

I went to Kenna's room and got her ready before we made our way downstairs. She went and played while I made breakfast.

I was trying to reach something in the top cabinet. It hurt so bad to stretch on my stomach where my healing scar was. I was trying to stretch and trying to be quiet while groaning in pain. Jason came into the kitchen.

"Hey, you can ask for help you know." He said. As he ran over to get it so I wouldn't fall while trying. Once I backed up, I looked down and my shirt had ridden up and it was showing. I quickly pulled it down. But when I glanced back up, Jason had a sad look on his face. He saw it. Oh no. He wasn't ever supposed to see it. This is so embarrassing.

"Um, can you finish breakfast? I don't feel well." I said and practically ran to my room. Once I shut the door I started crying about everything. He saw my scar. I can never leave my room again.

That afternoon I heard someone outside my door.

"No Kenna we can't go in there." It was Jason.

"Why?" She whined

"M doesn't feel good." Hearing him use my nickname brought a smile to my face. Maybe if Kenna was around, he wouldn't ask about earlier. I got up out of bed and cracked my door open.

"M!" Kenna yelled as soon as she saw me.

"Hey, Kenna."

"Are you ok?" She asked. "Why can't you play?" Her little voice brought a smile to my face.

"I just don't feel very good." I said. "Maybe I'll be better tomorrow."

"Can I come in there with you?" She asked as she was trying to look past me into the room.

"Sure." I said and opened the door. I glanced at Jason before closing the door.

Having Kenna around actually made me feel a lot better. She made me laugh and smile. Before I knew it, it was time to put her to bed.

I gave her a bath and got her in her pajamas. We read a book that she picked out and she was asleep by the time it was over. I put her in her crib and shut the door as quietly as I could. I turned around and Jason was standing there.

"Oh geez." I said as I clutched my chest. "You scared the crap out of me!"

"Sorry." He said with a chuckle. "Hey, can I talk to you?"

My heart started racing. "Uh sure."

We went to the living room. "Look about earlier" he started. "Don't be embarrassed. I know what happened to you and it makes me so angry every time I think about it. I wish I could have done something to help you. I get so mad at myself for not doing anything while that was happening to you."

I could see how honest he was being by the look on his face.

"Hey," I put my arm on his shoulder."Don't beat yourself up. What happened, happened and we can't change that. You were just doing your job and I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I have to live with these scars on me for the rest of my life and I will probably struggle with nightmares for a while, but I'm going to do my best to work through it and come out stronger in the end."

He gave me a small smile. "You are so strong and brave already."

"Well, I try" I said with a giggle. "I think I'm going to head to bed."

I got up off the couch and my scar was burning in pain. I clutched my stomach.

"Maddie, what's wrong?" Jason said.

"I don't know it just hurts." I responded.

"Let me look at it." He said as he helped me lay down on the couch.

I hesitated for a second before I slid my shirt up so he could see it. He slid his fingers over it and it sent shivers through me. He got up and went to the kitchen. He returned with an ice pack.

"I think you're just stressing your wound too much. This should help numb it." He placed the ice pack on my lower stomach and I took a sharp breath in. It was really cold.

"You ok?" He asked.

I just nodded and tried to steady my breathing. He sat on the floor. After a while, he spoke."I'm really sorry this is happening to you."

I took a deep breath and said, "Sometimes I am too, but then I tell myself that everything happens for a reason and if this wouldn't have happened I wouldn't have ever met you guys or Kenna."

"Well, I think we're all glad that we got to meet you." He responded. I simply smiled at him.

"I think it's better." I said as I slowly sat up. He put the ice pack back and came back to the living room. I stood up and headed upstairs. It actually felt a lot better. Maybe I'll get a good night's sleep tonight.