twenty three

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"Where's daddy?" Cali asked, following me through the store.

"At home making dinnnnner." I said, Cali next to me as she grabbed a random thing off the shelf then put it back. I noticed the butterfly ring on her finger and smiled.

"Oh" she giggled, dancing next to me as I grabbed goldfish for her to snack on at home.

"So mommy, Taryn asked me to come over." She said, riding on the shopping cart.

"Oh she did?" I asked.

"Yes! Tonight." One thing about kids, everything is sprung last minute.

We were in the guys section of target and I out of impulse grabbed Brendon some new skinny jeans. Along with that I got him some Grey V necks and new underwear. He needed it, so why not?

"Can you please call her mom? Please please please? I know I shouldn't leave Boots at home without me, but she really wants to have a sleepover." She exclaimed.

"I'll call her mom." I groaned, grabbing my cellphone.

Eventually her mom, Ruby, answered and we planned on me dropping Cali off when I was done shopping.

Eventually that was also done, and now I was sitting at home alone since Brendon had just left to go see Dallon.

"Heyo." Brendon later said, coming in through the front door and kissing me on the cheek. "You dropped Cali off at the sleepover?" He asked, me nodding.

"Today was hard." he sat next to me on the couch, me lazily turning to face him and throwing my legs on his lap.

"Why?" I asked, a concerned tone in my voice.

"My uh...My dad committed suicide this morning." He said, pinching in between his eyebrows.

"Holy shit, Holy shit Bren i'm so sorry." I said, him shrugging.

"Is it bad I don't feel that awful? He was such a monster." He said, his voice cracking. He choked back his tears, refusing to cry.

"Brendon, you can cry." I said, him shaking his head.

"I want to be strong for you and Cali, but sometimes it's hard when shit like this happens." he said, a tear streaming down his face.

I sat on his lap and hugged him tightly, him hugging me back even tighter as if he was holding onto me for dear life.

"When was the last time you saw him?" I asked.

"L-Last month. The day after Cali's birthday." he said, me rubbing his back.

"What happened?" I asked.

"I told him I was a father. He literally spat at me and told me I'd be terrible. I told him he was the worst imaginable and then I left." He nodded.

"Do you wish you guys made up before he died?" I asked, trying my hardest to comfort him.

"No. It's impossible. He was a piece of shit and i'm not even sad that he's gone." Brendon said, tears flowing down his face.

"In the letter he wrote, he said he left all his money to his grandchild. To put the money in the college fund." He started to cry even more. "I don't want his money, he didn't even know her name."

"We aren't taking that money, don't worry." I hugged him, him just lying in my arms with his arms around me.

"Never thought he'd have the balls to actually do it, yanno?" Brendon said, me nodding in response.

"He's not in a better place, he's in fucking hell." Brendon said, me nodding.

"Jesus christ, I cant stop thinking about when he hit me." Brendon said, sitting up straight with his head in his hands.

"Tell me about it, I'll listen."

"The first time ever, I was 6." He said, his voice monotone. "I was walking across the house with a glass of water and fell, and I spilt the water." He continued.

"Then what happened?"

"He screamed at me and slapped me across the face." Brendon choked out. "I told him to stop it and he threw a piece of the broken glass at me."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

Brendon stood up and showed me the scar on his eyebrow, that's where that was from.

"I'd get so mad when he hit my mom, One day I decided i'd beat the shit out of him myself. He knocked me out for the rest of the day." Brendon said.

"You're safe now." I said, and somehow he actually smiled.

"Im safe now." he said sadly, his arms now around me and his head on my chest.

"Do you want some pasta?" He asked, laughing and breaking the silence.

"You made pasta?" I asked, laughing harder.

"Yes, that's one thing I can actually make!" he laughed, making me smile.

"Yeah Urie, i'll have some pasta"

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