Prologue

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Louis' Point of View >>


" Follow your heart..."
That's all I hear.  Every day when I check my Facebook, or Twitter.  They're always telling me to follow my heart and to get better soon, but that's impossible now.  I can't do that.  After that horrific accident, I can't let anyone back in.  It's not because I'm afraid - well, maybe that's part of the issue - but because I'm disgusting.  I'm worthless, and I can't believe people when they make promises.  After all, promises are meant to be broken.  Secrets are meant to be shared.  Hearts are meant to be shattered.

That's all I've known for the past 9 months.  I've been following the quote that I saw over the internet "Trust no one; save yourself."  I don't trust anyone anymore, because I couldn't save myself when I did.  I put trust into those I loved, and I put my heart and soul into making the fans of One Direction proud.  I bet I'm disappointing them now; no, I know I'm disappointing them now.  It's not my fault, though.  They don't know what happened, and I'm not going to be the one to tell them.  I can't do that.  I'm ashamed of myself.

The hate never used to get to me, but after that happened it's all I can read.  In Google, I search up 'Louis' shit' or 'Louis' a fag'.  Things pop up all the time, not matter what insult I throw at myself.  It's probably not right, because I'm just destroying myself even further - I can't help it, though.  I can't help but want someone to be there for me, but I know no one cares.  They're all just curious, they don't really care.  No one cares.

That's why I can't follow my heart.  No one's worth being let in, and no one's made the true effort to try.  It stung for a while, but then I realized the truth - I'm not worth anyone's time.

They tell you to follow your heart, but if it's broken like mine - which piece are you supposed to follow?

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