Secrets Left Neglected

Chapter 16

Caoilainn

A couple of weeks later, after we both get off from a late night shift, my fingertips slowly move up Tadhg's bare chest, caressing the various marks left here and there from past rugby injuries. I relax and close my eyes taking in his heat and feeling my own heart home.

Wrapping his arms around me, I feel safe and sheltered within his embrace. We were just swimming in the nearby lake and are now languishing on the shore in the moonlight. The place is desolate at this time of the night. Everyone's probably sleeping. When work ended at the I-S tonight we snuck away to swim in the light of the moon afterwards. The water's not as cold as one might think and it feels great to wash away the grime of the day with a quick dip.

I reach up and plant a gentle kiss over Tadhg's heart while twirling his nipple with my free hand.

He nuzzles my hair and I lift my head so that we're eye to eye. Tadhg is slow and serious. He stares at me, skimming his fingers across my jaw and then, with both hands, cups my face in his hands. "I love you, a runsearc," he whispers softly. It's the first time he's said that to me and my heart swells. I've waited to hear those words for so long. I smile, savoring them.

"I love you, too, Tadhg," I reply quietly before licking him on the lips with my warm tongue and slipping it inside his mouth. A hitch in his breath and I feel his body come alive under me. In every place that I am soft and welcoming, he becomes hard and penetrating.

A little intimidated, I pull back. I'm not sure if I'm ready just yet. Part of me is. I've loved Tadhg for what seems like forever. But...I'm scared. I feel like we're still finding our way as a couple, instead of just friends.

Feeling my unease, Tadhg sits up and looks at me. "It's ok, Caoi," he says, running a warm hand across my bare shoulders. "We can wait. There's no rush. We have all the time in the world. We're together now."

Joining him, I sit up and lean forward on my folded legs pulling my knees in tight against my chest. Lost in thought I grow quiet before turning to look in his direction. "You're going away soon, right?"

He tilts his head and looks at me curiously. "You mean when I enlist?" When I nod my head, he confirms his answer. "Yeah, right after graduation. Is that a problem, Caoi?"

I can hear the nervousness in his voice. For as long as I can remember Tadhg's talked about joining the Marines one day; of serving his country. It's the last thing in the world I want for him; to go overseas and put himself in harm's way. I'm scared to death he won't come home, or worse.

In my heart, though, I know it's what he wants to do. I know it's part of who he is and I would never ask him to give that part of himself up.

"No, Tadhg," I reply after some time. "I love you. You're a Marine-"

"Technically, I'm not one yet, but-" he starts to say before I cut in on him this time.

"You're a Marine, Tadhg," I say, reassuring him. "You might not wear the uniform yet, but you'll always be my Marine. I'm going to worry like crazy and miss you something awful but I know this is what you're meant to do."

Not guarding my fears, Tadhg takes notice and lifts my chin. "What's wrong, then?"

"What if you leave and fall in love with someone else while you're gone?" I ask, my insecurities embarrassing me so that I have to look away.

"Someone else? In the Marines?" Tadhg asks me incredulously. "Are you serious? Caoi, no. Never. I love you. You're it. No one else."

"You're sure? What if you meet some sexy G.I. Jane when you're stationed overseas?"

Tadhg just shakes his head and laughs at me. "Why would I look at anyone else when I have my little hellcat waiting for me at home? No, just you, a rúnsearc. You're it."

With that, Tadhg leans in and we're lost in our kisses again. True to his word, there's no pressure from Tadhg to go any faster than I'm ready for, but that doesn't mean we don't explore one another in other ways. Our passion eclipses all else. Lying there on the shore of the lake, surrounded by nothing but rocks and trees and grass, we are in a place of intensity, full of feeling and emotion. We hold each other tight letting our whispers and whimpers carry into the darkness of night.

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