All of this past

Times like these

I had only just arrived when I heard Dan tuning my guitar, I could imagine him pretending to be Red Hot Chili Peppers as he did so, just like he did every time. He came backstage, indicating I was the only one left for the sound check. It was just my usual routine, I'd sing a few lines and Mark would adjust the different channels on his sound panel. I got back into my dressing room to change and look over the set list for tonight one last time. I hadn't brought out a new album for a while now, so I'd just be playing songs from my four albums, mixed with a few covers I liked to play. It had been pretty much the same set list on the other concerts in the last few months, a few changes here and there, except for two songs I normally didn't play. I'd start with Stuck, although I didn't know if Liam would remember he had said it was his favourite on the first album I ever wrote, and the last song was a new one too. I wanted to go over the lyrics once more when a knock sounded on the door, followed by Dan sticking his head around the corner.

"Everyone's at their seat Styles, they're ready for you." I smiled and nodded, checking my pockets for extra guitar picks and grabbing a water bottle out of the freezer. I liked my water ice cold and the only way to achieve that under the burning stage lights was freeze them beforehand.

I walked upstage, immediately blinded by the spots and put up my on-stage face, as I grabbed my guitar, pushing the extra nerves due to Liam being in the audience back as I welcomed everyone. Glad I got that over with I started playing the first chords, feeling more at ease as the song progressed. 

I was pretty relieved to see I was only one more song away from the break, as my mouth got dry and my water was already long gone. I hadn't been able to spot Liam in the crowd so far, so I decided to check his seating arrangements when I got back in my dressing room. I finished the last song and told the audience I would be back in half an hour before heading back to my dressing room to change into a different shirt, as this one was drenched with sweat already. I decided to change my pants too, opting for a light grey jeans and a dark green button up shirt. Dan would come in and tell me when it was time for part two, so I slumped down on the couch, enjoying my alone time with a beer in hand, my phone in the other. I tried not to feel disappointed at the fact Liam hadn't texted me, and checked which ticket I had gotten him. He should be on the right side of the PA-box, a few rows to the front. I don't think I'd seen him there, but he had written me to let me know he'd be there, so unless some emergency had come up, I knew he would be. He wasn't one to just not show up. I pulled out the set list once again, going over the lyrics for my last song and repeating the hand settings on the guitar once more before I heard the bell indicating the end of the break. Soon after, Dan came by to tell me it was time to go back up.

I skipped the introductions this time and just started to play the next song, biting back the nerves for the last one. Time flew by actually, the audience seemed to love what I was doing and sung along to the songs they knew, which was almost every single one. About 45 minutes after the start of the second part, I glanced at the paper with the set list on it and gulped.

"So, I'm already at the end of this evenings's concert. At first I would like to thank you all again for being here and for making this such a great night." My eyes wandered the crowd again, I still hadn't spotted Liam, in fact I had been too scared to search some more, afraid I wouldn't be able to continue singing the song I was at if I did. I looked at the area he was supposed to be in, and suddenly my eyes found a familiar face amongst the anonymous fans. I swallowed the lump that  had formed and cleared my throat before I could go on. "I've actually never performed this last song live before, so I hope everything goes well, bare with me if it doesn't." I was met by a few chuckles from the crowd and I could swear I saw a smile twitching on his lips. "I would like to dedicate it to someone who's really special to me. You'll learn to live again."