ʜᴀɴ ᴊɪsᴜɴɢ
It's been 3 months since hyunjin came. He also started calling me cute nicknames but he use 'sung' more often.
It reminds of how minho called me but in some ways I like how it rolled off hyunjin's tongue.
Minho barely call me so I spent more time hanging out with hyunjin, I don't mind though. I felt happy in hyunjin's presence.
I started feeling those things I used to feel whenever I'm with minho to hyunjin.
Whenever hyunjin smile, I'll feel a knot on my stomach. My heart always start to beat faster whenever he's close to me.
I'm completely aware of what's happening but I chose to ignore it. Deny it. Why? It's because I'm scared. I'm scared I'll hurt minho and I don't want that to happen so I chose to ignore my stupid feelings.
I'm currently preparing food for breakfast and I noticed hyunjin dressed up in a sweatpants and a black t-shirt. I watched as he put his shoes on.
"where are you going?" I asked as I peek my head out from the kitchen. He looked up at me before tying his shoes. "Dance studio" he said. "you're not going to have lunch here?" he shook his head and smiled. "nope. I still need to work on my dance" I nodded and started eating.
Hyunjin went inside the kitchen and ruffled my hair. "I'll get going now. If you need anything you know where to find me" I hummed and he bid his goodbye.
After I took a bath, I put a pair of jeans and a red t-shirt. I don't really know where I'm going but I still dressed up nicely.
I sat on my bed and grabbed my phone. I haven't talk to minho hyung for a while now so I decided to call him.
[sung? you called?] I'm not sure what to feel but I missed talking with minho hyung but there's a difference now. I missed him but not in that way.
"hey hyung, how are you?" I asked as I smiled softly. [I'm doing good. You?]
"I'm doing just fine hyung" I said as I reassure him. I heard him hummed at the other line. [does hyunjin take good care of you?] he asked.
My heart started beating faster again when I heard hyunjin's name. "he does" I said and he muttered a 'good'.
We talked and talked since we haven't done that in a week now. But then I decided to ask him a question...
"hyung can I ask you something?" I bit my lip as I wait for his answer. [yeah sure what is it?] he asked. I hesitate for a moment but decided to continue.
"hyung what if I fell out of love? What will you do?" there. I finally said it.
It's quiet for a moment but then minho speaks up. [ I'll let you be sung. I don't want to push you in a relationship that you don't want anymore. I'll respect that. Your happiness matters too. Why'd you ask?] I find myself tearing up at his words.I sniffed before answering.
"n-nothing hyung. It just popped out of my m-mind. It's nice t-talking to you again hyung. Take c-care" he muttered a 'take care too' before hanging up. I'm sorry hyung, I can't say this to you, at least not now.
I wiped my tears away and put my shoes on. I decided to fetch hyunjin at the dance studio this time so we can eat dinner together.
When I got to the studio, I didn't think I'll saw hyunjin shirtless. His raven hair falling in front of his eyes, sweat dripping down his body.
I dropped the water bottle I was holding and now hyunjin's attention is on me.
"sung?" I snapped out of my thoughts when I heard hyun called my name. I picked the watter bottle and when In looked up, hyunjin is now wearing a shirt.
"hey jinnie" I smiled as I walked towards him. I handed him the water bottle and he muttered a 'thanks' before drinking.
I watched as he drunk the water and It felt like I was watching him in slow motion. I shook my head and looked away.
"so what brings you here?" I looked up and met his gaze. " I thought you needed company" I said and he chuckled.
I walked towards the small table and grabbed his towel. I can feel his gaze piercing through me as he watched my every step.
I walked back towards where he stood and started wiping his sweat away. I started drying his hair then his face. He just stared at me the whole time.
I stopped wiping his face when my gaze landed on his lips. I stared at his lips for a moment before I looked up and saw him still staring at me.
That's when I realized that If I move any further, our lips would be touching.
I turned away but before I could take a step forward, he grabbed my wrist and we both fell on the floor with me on top of him, my arms in either sides of his head, his arms circling around my waist.
I looked at him shocked. Before I can register what was happening, I was being pulled into a kiss.
I can't help but melt into the kiss. It was slow but kind of needy. Stop. Jisung stop.
But I didn't. I ran a hand through his hair as we kiss and I felt his grip tighten on my waist. We pulled away to catch our breath.
I don't know what's gotten into me but I started kissing hyunjin again. I felt his left hand ran from my back until it reached my head to pushed me closer to him.
I tilted my head to deepen the kiss. I licked his lower lip and his mouth automatically parted letting out a soft whimper.
I came back to my senses and stopped kissing him. We're both panting heavily as we pulled away from each other. What the fuck we nearly had a make out session if I didn't stop myself.
I stood up and help him up. "I...Uhm... I-im going to w-wait for y-you outside" I said, not daring to look at him in the eyes.
I walked out of the dance room and waited for him outside. I leaned in the wall and slapped myself lightly. What the fuck jisung? I questioned myself. I don't fucking know anymore. But one thing's Im sure.......I wanted this.
I got startled when hyunjin showed by my side saying he's ready to go. I nodded and we started walking home.
No one dared to speak until we got to the apartment. I think hyunjin also needs to figure things out.
When we arrived at our shared apartment, I head directly towards my room not even wishing hyunjin a good night. He also doesn't stop me though.
I plopped down on my bed and started to think what just happened a while ago. I sighed knowing I can't avoid that topic forever and need to talk to hyunjin regarding that.
Fuck Han Jisung. Fuck.
