Chapter 38

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"I deserve more than that. I've been a super wife all these years. We decided I wouldn't work. I gave up a chance at a good job for him. He didn't want anyone around our child. You remember all that stuff that was going on with the daycares back then. He went crazy and wanted me to stay at home with Sharee. By the time it even looked like I could go look for a job or go back to school, Angel was born. The same thing happened when Jonathon was born, so we just decided I would be a stay-at-home wife."

"You are definitely right about deserving more, especially since you did all of that for him."

"Yeah, me too, but he sees things differently now. There is nothing I can do, and to be honest. I'm not trying anymore. All of the fight I had when this madness started is gone. I don't have any left in me."

"Well, you are going to be just fine. You have your beautiful children, and me and my hubby. When you need help, just let us know."

"Thanks, chick. I love you."

Well, I was anxious to get out of there and get on with my day. I left Kendra's and headed for Starbucks, so I could see what kind of ideas I would come up with for a writing project. I had my little laptop in my tote, and I was ready for some coffee. I could do all of this at home, but I was still a stay-at-home wife and a homebody. I needed to get used to getting out of the house. My home is a sanctuary which means, it is way too comfortable, and I would surely go somewhere and go to sleep. Since Kendra has my babies I would just sleep all the time, and nothing else would get done. My bed is really like kryptonite. I'm trying something different. My life is about to change drastically. 

This is something hard to deal with, and I'm really trying to do this. Yes, I've made up my mind. I'm going to do this. I'm my own cheerleader. Rah Rah whatever the rest of that cheer says.

Eventually, I pulled into the parking lot at Starbucks. When I saw all of those college kids I thought about getting back into my car and going to the library. I decided I couldn't be scared to do new things that I was going in there. Once I got inside I got the wide-eyed stare from the young people. I walked up to the counter and ordered the only thing I ever ordered from Starbucks. The strawberry frappe.

 I found myself at a little corner table away from the door. No matter what establishment you were in, if you sat close to the door, the people who came in stared at you oddly. I pulled out my mini laptop and connected to the Wi-Fi. I was in that writer's group yesterday and they were telling me about apps and programs you could use for writing, so I decided to start there first, and if I came up with an idea, I would either email it to myself or write it in my little notebook. I would enjoy myself today.

I began to research and found they had quite a few writing applications. For some reason, I wanted to make sure everything was perfect before I began my writing journey. I needed to be prepared. This could be the way I earn a living after I divorce Gavin. This meant everything had to be just right. I would gather everything I needed to gather for this task. While I was thinking about all of the possibilities my phone rang, it was Excalibur. He finally got back to me.

 "Hello Miss Adassa, how have you been?"

"I've just been busy with family and my children. It's been a little hectic around here as of late."

"I know what you mean. I've had a ton of work myself, and my kids have been off from school sick. There was some kind of bug going around, one caught it, came home with it, and we all got it. It has been extremely difficult to deal with. I left a message sometime last weekend to let you know, just so you didn't think I was blowing you off."

"Oh no, I didn't think blowing me off; I thought you were busy like me."

"I didn't feel weird at all, and he wasn't suspicious of what I was doing over the weekend. I don't know why I was tripping. Gavin was always suspicious of me doing anything that didn't include him. I have to get out of thinking like that. Excalibur was not my husband or even my boyfriend."

"So, what are you up to right now?"

"I'm at a coffee house in Hyde Park."

"Starbucks?"

"Yes."

"I live around the corner from the one on 53rd."

"How ironic that's where I am right now."

"Oh really, what made you come all the way over here?"

"My sister lives in Hyde Park, my children have been spending a lot of time with her lately. I came through here to drop off some clothes for them. Since I was in the area I decided to come to have some coffee and play with my laptop. I'm trying to get into writing. It's something I have always wanted to do, so I'm doing research on some things that will help me move along."

"Wow, that is great. There is so much to learn about you."    

"Do you mind if I come and have a cup of coffee with you?"

"I don't mind at all."

"I'll be around there in a few minutes."

Well, I didn't have any idea that he lived in this neighborhood. Hyde Park is beautiful, it's like a museum with no doors. Every building is an exhibit. This neighborhood makes you want to walk around and stare. I love to come over here and walk around. I love my sister, but I love her neighborhood too. 



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