Just Like James Dean

Gripped You Tight & Raised You From Across The Street

"Castiel!" Anna called. Her voice was perhaps the only one besides Lucifers that sent shivers down my spine.

"Come help with the groceries!"

I groaned and got up without much resistence, because when Anna desired someone or something she would do anything to get it.

Tonight the stars shined a little more bright and the moon had an eerie glowed making everything feel translucent.

I had been making my way outside to the trunk when I heard the crying. It sounded like a small child and was the most heartbreaking thing Ive heard in a long time. Pure pain radiated from the sobs enliting my curiosity. I walked further down the driveway to see a man walking with a kid holding him tight. I was just about to turn around when I heard the gruff voice.

"Its gonna be okay Sammy."

I looked harder noticing Deans bold figure and shadow.

"Who is that?" Asked Gadreel behind my shoulder startling me.

"Thats Dean." I gasped in realization. What was Dean doing out at this time? And why was he holding Sam tighter and closer than usual. It was in Deans nature to stand protectivly next to Sam and place a hand at his shoulder when he sensed something odd. But now Dean hugged Sam as close as possible while he clutche on to his brothers shirt sobbing relentlessly.

"Oh.. The Dean you spoke of."

I accidentaly mentioned Dean one night at supper, leading to a bombard of questions from all around the table. They all believed that Dean was having an effect on me. And not a good one. Yes since I befriended Dean I have been speaking out more and thinking for myself- but that couldnt mean anything. All of my siblings thought otherwise - all except Lucifer. He hadnt spoke a word throughout dinner until the topic of Dean came up. "Maybe hes doing good to you Castiel. And if he is you must allow him to, its not like you have much of an option, do you?" And with that said the topic of Dean was dropped and we continued to eat quitely.

We both stood there a moment looking over at Dean. He seemed to be limping.

"Was he injured at school earlier no?"

"No." I said dryly.

My breath catched at the image of Dean being hurt. Not in a thousand years could i comprehend Dean Winchester. His pop culture reference, his need to put everyone else before him. Not ever could I begin to understand that boy. But still, he was the person who taught me most about life and free will and I would never wish to see him hurt. The image of him bleeding and struggling for air brings nothing but pain and the strong need to make it stop. To make it all stop.

"Well than why are you standing here like a fool, go bring the boy inside."

Before I could even analyze the situation I was running towards him in long strides, desperate to save the only thing that gave me hope. "Dean!" I called. He beamed at me when I finally reached him. The red all covered his face and clothes. i saw how cuts and bruises were like pinpoints on a map covering his face and throat. How the bursted veins popped out like highways. He didnt look like Dean now. He looked as if he were a complete different person. The rage that filled his eyes wasnt him and the blood looked foreign dripping from his face.

"D-dean.." I longed to reach foward and try to make it all stop. Just to wipe the tear forming at the corner of his eye away. But now he seemed so fragile that I was afraid I might break him. He looked so vulnerable, so full of hurt. I havent known Dean for long but I can tell this is unusual for him.

"Dean come inside." He tried protesting but all failed. Nothing was going to stop me from helping him. I grabbed him by the arm and tightned my grip everytime he protested. Honestly I hadnt any idea how he had remained conscious. I brought them in directing him and his brother towards the couch. After 15 minutes of coaxing and calming me, Anna and Samndriel were helping to attend their wounds. Samandriel cleansed Sams lips and cheeks while Anna held his hand soothing him. She was a natural at this, it was in her nature to be caring.

"Stay still." I tried telling him. Dean kept squirming and itching at the cuts and scrapes that I wasnt attending at the moment. He insisted that he could take care of himself and clean the wounds but anyone in the right mind could tell that he would probably just hurt himself even more. Still covered in blood and bruises that I would be sure to take care of, he still radiated bright as ever. I could feel it in my bones and everytime he spoke. The pure white light emitting from him couldnt be natural. James Dean had nothing on him.

When the job was almost done and there were only a couple more cuts to bandage I decided to direct the elephant in the room.

"Who did this to you?"

I tried asking in a soothing and calmed matter but my voice faltered and cracked with sadness and anger.

Dean cracked a smile that told me everything right then and there. Ive only spent about 3 days around his presence but I could effortlessly see through his facade. It wasnt the smile he had on playing with the boxes in detention. It was a broken grin that crooked at the end and held back a flood of tears threatning to escape at any moments notice.

"Just my deadbeet excuse for a dad. We uhh, kinda got into this fight so me n Sammy left."

Now everyone in the room began listening attentively to the conversation. Trying to grasp the fact that their own father had done this. Father never mistreated us - althought he was almost never home - when he was he would love us more than anything. I could understand the shock and pain in Samandriel and Annas faves now.

"He did this to you? To you and your brother?" Samandriel asked in disbelief. Sam only nodded his head as an answer staring at the wood floor.

Im used to anger. The anger Ive always had towards myself for not being normal, the anger of not being good enough for my family, anger that came from my very core and shook the frames of the world around me. This wasnt the anger I held in my heart from the day of my diagnosis. This wasnt the anger I held towards God for taking my mother away. This anger came in flashes of hot white and made my hands shake like never before and the pit of my stomach was enveloped with heat. The heat went from my stomach to my cheeks and was burning from the inside out.

I thought that I might combust in a molotove of heavenly fire until I looked at Sam. Me and Sam werent as close as me and Dean. Dean did talk about him almost on a daily basis but we never really st down and talked. But now Sam sat there with bandaids on his mouth and a tip of tissue up his nose. And thats when I understood the smallness of a child and the innocence they bared, he was so fragile.

The sight seemed to sooth my anger and fear to analyze the situation of Dean being hurt and not having anywhere else to go. He was alone and yet didnt seem to worry about anyone but Sam as if he just werent important enough.

Dean gave the word self depreceation a whole new meaning.