Loki - coming back

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"Y/n?"
You look up from your book and meet Thors gentle blue eyes. "Are you okay?" He asks, worry clear in his voice. You sigh and get up, walking right past him without answering.
It had been like this for a while. Ever since Thor had announced that Loki had died, you had avoided talking to him. Not because you blamed him of course, but because he reminded you of Loki. You knew very well that the Asgardian actually was the son of Laufey, he had told you that himself, but him and Thor still reminded of each other in ways you could not explain with words.
It had been around one month now. You missed the trickster. His energy, his voice, his hugs and kisses that always made your day.. You needed that so badly right now.
"Lady y/n, please, stop this."
You groan in annoyance and turn around to face Thor once again. "What?" You snap at him. No, it's not exactly fair that you treat him that way, but this was one of your bad days. You missed your lover. You missed Loki.
"I know this must be hard, but shutting everyone out won't bring him back."
You wanted to punch him but it wouldn't help. He was right. You couldn't bring Loki back no matter what you did, so why try? Why act like this when it would only make things worse?
"I'm sorry Thor, I really am.."
You whisper before giving the tall male a hug. Both you and Thor needed that right now. You two stand there for a few minutes in silence, your face hidden in the blondes chest while he's stroking your h/l h/c hair with one hand and resting his other hand on your your waist. Just like Loki used to.. you shake your head and pull away, smiling softly at Thor and mutter a quiet "thank you" before going to your room.
You got out of your f/c dress and into your nightgown. An emerald green lace dress with small flowers of gold and a black ribbon around the waist. Lokis favorite. You smile at the memory. He had given it to you last year for your birthday along with a promise ring. You still wore it. It was a beautiful silver ring with small white and green stones, and a heart in the middle. You promised him that you wouldn't take it off until the day he'd replace it with a wedding ring. You were still waiting for that to happen.
A silent tear run down your cheek as you stroke the ring lightly. It felt so light back then, but now, it feels heavier and heavier for every day you wear it.
"Maybe.."
You mumble as you slide the ring half off your finger, but stop before it's all the way off. You wanted to. You wanted to take it off so badly, to throw it across the room along with all your memories of the frost giant, but you couldn't. You loved him too much, and even though he was dead, you still wanted to keep your promise.
"You should be asleep."
You quickly slide the ring back on your finger and turn around, staring directly into the thunder gods blue eyes.
"Thor.. you scared me."
You smile at him and lay down on the bed, quickly pulling the covers over you. The dress wasn't exactly covering the parts it should.
"Why are you still up? You're going on a mission with the Avengers tomorrow, you need your sleep more than me."
You speak, your voice softer than it has been for a long time.
"I was worried about you lady y/n."
Thor says as he walks over and sits on the edge of your bed. You, being the cuddle lover you are, lay your head in his lap and he starts playing with your hair.
"At least he died knowing he was loved by you more than anyone else. He was happy y/n."
You sigh at his words. You had never quite understood how a prince, a frost giant, how a man as wonderful as Loki, could be happy with you.
"Don't let your bad thoughts make you think otherwise lady y/n. He loved you dearly and if he was still here, I'm sure he would tell you the same."
A small smile appears on your lips as you close your eyes, imagining that it is Loki who is stroking your hair and not Thor.
"Sleep now, you need your rest young lady."
Thor whispers and tugs you in like a small child, kissing your forehead before leaving you alone once again.
He always knew how to cheer you up, even on your worst days he made you smile. Who knew the god of thunder could be this gentle and caring? Well, you didn't, until you met him.
"Don't tell me you're starting to fall for my brother."
You freeze at the sound. The voice. No. He couldn't have gotten in. The door hadn't opened since Thor left, the window was locked, he couldn't..
"Don't be afraid darling. Don't hide from me. Come now, my queen, turn around. I have longed to see your face for far too long."
You immediately turn around and there he is, skin and flesh, your Loki.
"Loki.. but you were dead, how did you survive? What happened? Where have you been? Why did you wait for so long? Wh-"
You get interrupted by him as he pulls you out of the bed and into his arms, holding you close to his chest. His heart.. it's beating so fast..
"How I survived will stay my secret for now my goddess. For tonight, please do not worry and do not ask any questions. Just stay here in my embrace."
Silent tears turn into sobbing as you hug him back and let it all out. The anger, the sorrow, the confusion, the doubt, all the things you've held in for so long. He's alive, Loki is really alive.
"I've missed you so much.."
"I know y/n, but I am here now. I promise you my queen, I shall never leave your side again for as long as you want me to stay."
"Stay forever."
You whisper and look up at him with pleading eyes. You wouldn't be able to handle if he left you again.
"As you wish my queen. But, please keep my return as a secret between us for now."
"Yes, my king."

// sorry it's shitty, I have a horrible writers block//

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