Come On, Wattpad: A Rant Book

1

When the famous person (Let's go with Harry Styles) falls instantly in love with the overrated main character (whose name is something overrated like Amy)

"Hey, what's your name?" the hot smexy very beautiful hot i.e, one and only Harry Styles, who I've had a crush on for 4 years, asked in his deep sexy husky voice.

"My name's Amy." I blush and stare into his orbs. He quickly picks me up bridal style and asks if I can be his girlfriend. He makes out with me and-

I know I kind of did this before... but really, is all they do is just pick out the huge directioner- or the one shy one abused by her father, or the one who doesn't even know what one direction is- and he just eats her face off. And then they get married and they find out she's related to some other member or Simon Cowell or has a long-lost sister. This won't happen in an AU, or least real life. And how about not being so quick? Like here:

Chapter 1- Meet

Chapter 2- Make out

Chapter 3- ...ya catch my drift?

Chapter 4- Married with 7 kids

And enough or else- nevermind, there's the fire out of my ears...

When the main character explains something more than her best friend.

I look up at the mirror and put my hair in a messy bun with some light pink blush, and FALSIES mascara with Gucci eyeliner and red lipstick. I don't bother to put eye shadow because I know Harry doesn't love me for my looks.

I head to the closet and pick out an oversized sweater that is pink and says 'I love 1D' and tribal print pants that I know Harry will love because they're his favourite shade of golden honey brown, almost as golden as my hair that's put up in a messy bun with a red hairband I got from my dead mother, then I put on my blue-also Harry's favourite shade of navy blue- converse. Then I give myself a quick once-over, and decide I should wear my other 42000000 tribal pants. But what to pick? What would Harry like?

GET OVER YOURSELF. You just said Harry didn't like you for looks. And if I was a celebrity and saw my boyfriend wear a pink shirt that says "Maddy is awesome" I wouldn't go out with him. I'd be creeped out! But, not in the parallel worlds, noooo.

When Amy talks about Sherlock's deep voice.

People wouldn't read it  if they didn't watch the show, and since they did THEY ALREADY KNOW ABOUT HIS DANG DEEP HUSKY MAGNIFICENT VOICE SO NO NEED TO EXAGGERATE IT.

Sherlock's purple shirt.

That magical shirt will not go back to him. I'd fight to keep it. Maddy's purple shirt. Yep. 

"Nope," Amy said, popping the P.

AND THAT'S it for now..... :3