the color orange, and other things twisted by chronic illness

#inspirational

i am 

stubborn.

it took me 

a while

to accept

my situation.

there would be 

days where

i would 

push myself

beyond 

what was doable

because

that is what

i used to 

be able to do.

my joints 

would sob.

i would keep walking.

my head

would scream.

i would keep reading.

too stubborn

to admit defeat.

until i couldn't

ignore it 

anymore.

i wasn't

being a hero.

i wasn't

being #inspirational,

"pushing in spite

of the odds."

i was 

being too stubborn

for my own good.

i was 

hurting myself.

when i finally

accepted things,

and begrudgingly 

slowed down,

i learned that

i could persist

in my own ways

without causing harm

to my health.

maybe that

can be

inspirational.