Chapter 52

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"Hi sweetheart." Josh stood up from the table, opening his arms and enveloping me into a a deep hug. "Are you okay?"

I couldn't even answer. My head was pounding and I was exhausted, and all I wanted to do was wake up from this nightmare. "I'm fine."

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked, handing me a glass of water.

Did I? What was there to say? Everyone I knew was lying to me. Even Josh probably. My chest felt tight, and I was pretty sure if I didn't lie down soon, I may faint. The doctor didn't want me to leave, and made me sign all kinds of paperwork saying I wouldn't sue if I died. And then, instead of resting and taking it easy, I hopped on a plane to Rhode Island.

Luca would look for me here eventually, but it was a better bet than New York.

"I think I just need to lay down. I'm not feeling great." I said, taking a deep breath.

"Absolutely." Josh nodded. "Just let me know if you need anything, Char, okay? I'm... I'm so sorry for everything you're going through. I love you, sweetheart."

"I love you, too." I mumbled as I headed up the stairs to my room. I opened the door, tossing my purse to the chair by the window. It was the only thing I had of my own since I didn't make it back to the hotel before my prison break. Luckily, I kept some clothes here for when I came into town, so I changed into some sweats and climbed into bed.

When I left the hospital, I had no idea where I was going. I knew there would be repercussions of my hasty choice, but none of that mattered to me. All I cared about was putting as much distance between me and the truth as human possible. I need to get away. From my mom. From Luca. From my risen from the dead brothers and father. From that whole damn thing.

Yesterday was a blur, and I wasn't sure if it was because the events that unfolded or because I was concussed. My brothers were alive. My father was alive. After all of this time and tears I shed thinking they were dead, wishing I could talk to them or tell them some stupid little detail of my day. They were closer than I thought all along. Not only were they alive, but thy were apart of the Mafia. The same Mafia I'd been trying like hell to stay away from for the last few months.

And the worst part of all was that Luca knew. He knew every little detail, but never breathed a single word of it to me. He was content to string me along and make me think that what we had was real, making his beautiful promises on a bed of lies.

I was so ashamed of myself that I was nauseated. A rush of emotions consumed me so much so that I couldn't even distinguish between them. I had no idea what I was feeling. I was just a mess of anger and hurt and frustration and embarrassment. Worst of all was the growing void inside my chest that Luca once occupied. The farther I drove, the larger it became. Hearing he lied to me ripped my heart right out of my chest. It was a cruel twist of irony when the one person who could fix your hurt was the one who caused it in the beginning.

Somehow, out of all the hurt I was feeling, the betrayal from Luca was the worst. To some extent I understood. I knew he was bound by rules and order within the Mafia, but he swore up and down that he would be honest with me. I told him from the beginning that it was a dealbreaker for me, and... God, I was so stupid to fall for it.

It was only a matter of time before my mom got home, and I was dreading that conversation. She had the answers I so desperately needed, and when it came down to trusting her, Luca, or Antonio, I would go with her every time. She was still my mother. For better or worse, we were family and we were stuck together. I kept going back and forth between being furious that she had kept this from me, but still feeling like a child who just needed her mother.

Luca's betrayal hurt cut deeper because I had fallen in love with him. I chose him. He showed me how passionate and beautiful love could be, he took care of me, I thought he was the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with. And then I found out it was all built on lies. One specific lie that I wasn't sure I would ever get over.

Was this the only reason he came into my gallery that night? Was any of this even real? How did I know it wasn't all just a giant set up?  He said he didn't know until he went to Italy, but he lied about other things. Maybe he was lying about that, too.

He seemed sincere, and God I wanted to believe he was more than just about anything in the world. But the truth was, I hardly knew Luca. He kept himself closed off like a vault, and all this time he knew secrets about me that even I didn't know.

The words he spoke to me last night played in my mind like a broken record, only confusing me more. What were the chances that he had stepped into my gallery by chance? Not likely.

I fell for everyone of his tricks. I had let him make me believe that we could make this work, that we could actually have a future together. The thought of it made me sick now. I didn't mean enough to him for him to tell me the truth. It took months for him to finally come clean, all the while, I played the fool. Everyone tried to convince me this was a bad idea, hell, even Luca himself told me I should leave him. I was just too naive, or stubborn, to accept it.

Just before I fell asleep, I turned my phone back on, ready for the barrage of messages I was about to get. The second they got back to the hospital and found out I was gone, they would be horrified. I knew Luca and my mother would both have tried to reach me at least a hundred times.

My suspicions were confirmed when it finally powered up. Twelve missed calls, two voicemails, five text messages, and that was just from Luca. Marco and Angelo had been texting me as well, and I had several from my mother.

Not feeling brave enough to hear Luca's voice yet, I checked the texts.

Where are you? Call me now.

If you don't call me, I am going to come find you. I need to know you're safe.

You're really scaring me, Charlotte. Please just call me back.

Baby, I am so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you like this. Please just talk to me.

Charlotte, you are the only thing that matters to me. Please don't do this. Please call me back. I love you.

He sounded angry at first, but got more emotional as the texts went on. He was probably drinking. Were they all there together? He and my brothers and Antonio? The thought of it made me nauseous.

There was not a doubt in my mind that Luca was sorry, but was he sorry for what he did or that he got caught?

I clicked his voicemail.

"Charlotte, please call me. I am so sorry, baby. For everything. I am done lying to you or keeping things from you. I'll do whatever you want, please just hear me out. Come home. I need you. If it's what  you need, I'll leave. I swear to God, I will do whatever it takes to make this work. Just please call me back. I need to hear your voice and know that you're okay. I love you, baby."

I could hear his hoarse breathing for a few minutes at the end of the message before he hung up. The desperation in his voice was killing me. Luca was crying. I never knew him to be the emotional type and hearing the emotion in his voice as he spoke pulled at my heart.

And leave? Did he really mean that?

I just needed some time and space to wrap my mind around all of this. I loved Luca, that was never the question. I just didn't know if I could be apart of the Mafia, especially now, knowing everything I did. And even if I could overlook his job, he lied to me. All I asked for was honesty. To be worth the truth. And he couldn't give me that.

Instead of calling him back, I cried and cried until I fell asleep.

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Thanks so much for reading guys!

I'm going to start posting questions at the bottom of each chapter. One about the book and one random. Jump in and interact if you want, and be sure to vote and comment if you enjoyed the story!

1. Do you think Charlotte will forgive Luca?

2. Where are you from?

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