Full Circle

16

"Well...there c..could be 8" Bella spoke bravely and I took my head from my hands to look to her

"Bella that's not the answer" Rosalie snapped venomously "You don't want this"

"Alice?" Bella asked turning to me

I avoided her eye contact to look down at my feet.

I had fallen in love with Bella the human, I knew I would love Bella the vampire, probably more than when she was human but in all my visions there was never a clear cut decision of what she wanted.

I had thought about it constantly and I wanted her forever but for some reason I couldn't seem to swallow the huge lump that was developing in my throat.

"Bella right now I don't really know what I want okay?" I said in a strained voice before I could meet my eyes with hers again

"What do you mean; you don't know what you want?" Bella asked furrowing her eyebrows, she sounded like I was slowly ripping her heart from her chest

"I do want you forever, believe me because I want that more than anything but I don't want to make that decision by force like what happened to me. I don't want him to get his way and have you changed because we're scared of him. I don't want this life altering decision to be made on the basis of a vampire chasing you, it's not going to happen like that" I said firmly while I shook my head "I just think this conversation would be more appropriate at a later date and between the two of us"

"Well it does concern the rest of us as well" Edward said regretfully "We would be dealing with a newborn and a nomad all at once. That's twice the work, sure you'd be strong but you would be a handful"

"We don't know that" I defended "The experience is different for everyone"

"You're both right" Jazz interrupted "From experience, newborns are a lot of trouble but Bella could be different seeing as she is willing to take this on"

"And it's not about the workload for me Edward, it's the principal. James forced the doctor to change me because he was scared. I do want Bella to be changed but I don't want it to be under this circumstance" I glared over at my brother who quickly looked away from the daggers I was sending him. I turned to look to my love, my gaze softening immediately "Does any of this make sense?"

"I agree with what you're saying Pixie" Emmett interrupted with a smirk "Besides I kind of want to fight this guy, seeing as he has managed to get away a few times, I want to see what he's got once we actually catch him"

"But Alice I want to be like you; what difference does the time that I'm changed make?" Bella asked "What difference does the situation make when the end result with both being the same?"

"It makes a lot to me Bella. I want you to have some experiences while you are human and while you still can. I don't want this to happen to you too soon, you wouldn't have even thought about this if James wasn't around" I nodded "I know this is selfish of me as well Bells but he can't have you, he can't add you to his collection of winnings. If we do change you, what's to stop him from killing you anyway?"

"Nothing" Carlisle replied

"But you'll have one more person to fight him" Bella said

"If we can't beat them with the 7 of us already, then I deserve to be hunted down" I growled "We can stop him"

"And how do you plan on doing that exactly?" Jazz asked

"I don't know yet but I'll figure it out" I grumbled "He's found a loop hole in my abilities so I'm going to have to work around that somehow"