Just What I Needed

Just What I Needed (69)

Silently Keely stood stock still, her breathing rough and audible even in the quiet morning.

Fiddling with the strap of her bag that she had packed, she didn’t know what to do. Half of her wanted to sprint into the house, find her dad and then hug him. The other half wanted her to head in the complete opposite direction.

Confliction, confliction; why was it always confliction with her these days?

It was early in the morning; the cab she’d called from the airport was long gone, leaving her standing blankly in front of her dad’s house.

The place still looked exactly as it had every other time she’d seen it at four in the morning when she’d been unable to sleep or came home late. The trees around the farmhouse swaying gently, the moon giving a little light to her path and the barn from behind the house reflecting the light with the bright tin roof; it was the same.

In fact it was almost eerie that it could look the exact way she left it, down to her dad’s old truck parked in front of the house. How could this place be the way she’d left it, frozen in time, when she felt like it had been years? It felt like she was a different person.

She was a different person now, but oddly the same as well.

When she’d left here she’d been running, when she came back she was running too.

Trying to control the panic that was beginning to bubble in her stomach, she tightened her grip on her guitar case and stepped forward, pushing open the front door with the familiar squeak.

As she stepped into the house, the panic grew, becoming a firm ball in her throat, but she couldn’t get rid of it as she gulped, instead feeling like she was close to chocking. Kicking off her sneakers from the show, she moved further in, her wide eyes taking in everything. Even the way the raggedly old blanket was slung over the arm of the couch was the same, and it just worsened her panic.

There was not a sound in the house to indicate that anyone was awake, so she kept moving. Once in the kitchen she couldn’t help but notice the sugar container she and father waged a silent battle over was in the middle of the island. Before she would have instantly moved it back beside the coffee maker, but now she crept past, hoping to keep her feet muffled against the flooring. The bills were stacked on the counter, the photos in their same places on the walls, work gloves thrown carelessly on the table, a flannel jacket flung over the back of a chair.

It was almost comforting that nothing had changed, that everything was just the way she’d left it. But it was mostly terrifying for her.

Closing her eyes against the sight, she moved past down to the hall that would lead to the bedrooms. For a moment she paused outside of her closed bedroom door, but quickly turned away, heading deeper into the dark house thrown into shadows.

Tiptoeing closely to the door at the end of the hall that was left ajar, she pushed it forward with an awkward elbow, peeking her head inside. The light that the moon gave off was slanting through the window in an odd silvery glow, but it was enough for her to see the outline of the body covered in the blanket. The door gave a slight creak when she accidently knocked it further open with her arm.

Wincing, she watched as her father’s outline gave a grunt before rolling over in the other direction.

Heaving a sigh of relief she retreated back to her dark oak door.

Clenching her jaw Keely just shoved it open, it swinging open without a sigh. For a moment she glanced about, finding all her old concert posters were in place and the photos she’d left framed with a slight film of dust on everything in the room. But when she glanced to the wall, she saw empty shelves that had once been filled with records as she’d been getting them sent to her throughout the tour.