Chapter Thirty-Four

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July 31st, 2014


I stared at the blue notebook that was laying on my desk across from me. He hasn't shown up to school after we shared an evening on his birthday, and he hasn't talked to me either. I mean, it had been a little more than two weeks, I was expecting a least a phone call for him to tell me that everything was okay.

Their cars weren't home, though. And Calum hadn't heard from him either.

As I continued looking at the blue notebook, a thought popped into my head. He made all of those journals saying things that he hates about himself; why don't I make this one about all the things that I love about him? I jumped up from my bed and over to the notebook, where the first page was still what he had written about me.

It took me thirty minutes to complete about six pages, and by that time, I was hungry and had to pee. I already had planned out what I was going to write. Luke had written down a lot about himself that made him disgusted, so I was going to write those exact same things into a category of things that I really love about him. Because it's true, I do love those things about him. But that doesn't mean I necessarily love him.

"You know who's cute?" my mum asked when I walked into the kitchen. "Luke is cute. You two should date. I've told you so many-"

"I am dating him." I was fed up with her always asking me and talking to me about him. For the longest time, she knew I had a crush on him, but now, finally, I told her that we actually had something going on. I'm pretty sure she always saw us almost kiss and go on dates before so...

"I know."

"Then why'd you-"

"Honey, I needed you to admit it to me. We hardly talk anymore," she pouted. I sat on the counter and stuck my feet out.

"Then let's talk. What about though?" I asked.

"Tell me what you like about Luke?" I nodded and shrugged, but I didn't know what to say. Can I go get the journal?

"I like, how he's so tall, that's one thing." She laughed and I knew by then I was already blushing. "He's really cute, like really, really cute. He has great hair-"

"Yeah, we know he's attractive. What else?" I laughed at my mum and thought some more.

"He didn't exactly grow up with nice people, but somehow he ended up being the sweetest guy I've ever met. He's so down to earth and he really knows how to treat a girl, even though I'm only his second girlfriend," I kept thinking. "His laugh, it's so contagious once he thinks something is really funny. His smile, it lights up a room and he just doesn't realise that. I even think that little white mark on his one tooth is cute, which makes me feel weird for saying that. But I like it. I like him a lot."

My mum was smiling at that point, and I could have sworn that I saw tears in her eyes for a second.

"I was in a relationship in high school with a guy named Bradley," she started and I groaned but she held up one finger, saying that she wanted to finish the short story. "I claimed that I loved him, but looking back on it, we were foolish for a month and a half of dating. And I guarantee something for you, Paige. You'll look back one day on your relationship with Luke, and you won't regret one bit of it. At least I hope not."

"Me too, mum," I whispered. "I certainly don't regret it now."

--

Usually, if I went to the local grocery store to buy feminine products, I wouldn't expect to see anyone I knew for the ten minutes I was there. But, in aisle 10, stood my temporarily missing in action boyfriend with a black backpack strapped on his shoulders. And he didn't even smile at me.

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