(TRIGGER WARNING: Involves cutting, depression, smut, swearing etc.
Requested? Yesh.)
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You've never had it this bad. The world around you turned, from the whiskey running through your blood. Nights like this one, was the absolute worst. Suicide thoughts, blades and whiskey. That was basically what your life consisted of. Your girl (who you've been dating for almost 2 years now) was gonna be home any minute now. You don't know why you did this to yourself. But for some sick reason it all felt like things just... faded away. Y'know like, when you drink. Except this leaves scars, both physically and mentally.
You looked down at the 100 dollar champagne, that you've just opened. Beside it laid your sharpened razor, on the white counter sink. You looked in the mirror, being terrified with the sight. Your makeup being smeared all over your face. You hadn't even realized that you were crying. You picked up the razor, and felt that all too familiar feeling against your skin. Stinging in the best way.
You looked at your right arm, and noticed all the new scars plastered like an opened tattoo. You hadn't even noticed how many new you made, until now. 7 huge scars upon all the faded. You heard the door downstairs open, her beautiful voice ringing throughout the house.
"Shit." You cursed, to yourself. You pulled you sleeve down, running to bed. You laid down pretending to be asleep, hearing her footsteps enter the room. You felt her eyes trained to your flawless face, not knowing about any of what you've just done. Or practically, done for a while now. Her lips pressed against your forehead, her body sneaking under the covers.
You wake, looking around. Her warm body, missing your side. You shivered, wanting to feel her touch. Your feet hit the ground, as you left the bed. You walked down the stairs, scratching your itching face on the way. You yawned, walking into the kitchen, seeing the love of your life standing with her back to you. A smile automatically made it's way onto your face, being happy you got to spend the rest of your life with her. You looked at the ring on your finger, sighing. You got married very early into your relationship, but only because your knew it was right.
"Morning." You muttered, waiting for her to turn around and kiss you. She finally turned around, and noticed the dry blood seeping through your white shirt. She gasped, and dropped the cereal bowl.
"Oh my gosh, baby what happened?!" She ran to your side, and you mentally cursed yourself since you hadn't even noticed the blood. Here it all goes. She rolled up your sleeve, having a little hard time since it stuck to your skin. Her mouth hung open, her heart shattering into the tiniest pieces on the floor.
"Is this what i think-" She didn't need to finish the sentence, since your head was nodding without thinking. You were tired of coming up with explanations. It was the cat.
"But... w-why?" She asked, having a hard time comprehending the situation. Was this because she wasn't good enough for you? Wasn't she making you happy? You looked down,
regretting the decision now more than ever.
"I-I think it's because it makes me feel good... I don't know.." You stuttered, looking down feeling embarrassed of yourself. You didn't want to look her in the eye, you just... couldn't. You knew she was disappointed.
"But.. you mean everything to me. I don't know what to say." She kept her gaze at your aching scars. You still didn't dare to look at her, but you knew she was crying. You felt her tears on your wounds.
"I-I'm sorry." You stuttered yet again, tears slipping freely down your own cheeks now. She sniffed once, starting to open your shirt slowly. She carefully removed your shirt, inspecting all the burn scars and all the fading scars in your skin.
She carefully kissed her way down your chest, picking you up like you were glass. She took you to your bedroom, and placed your fragile body onto the bed. She continued kissing down your stomach, tracing your beautiful scars with her tongue. She came to your pants, pulling the fabric down, your underwear included. You moaned a little, surprised by this. Before you knew it her tongue met your core, feeling the smooth lips of you against her tongue, i groaned. loud. Her fingers doing her magic, deftly pulling my lips apart until she could drag her tongue across me.
The effect her tongue, and her fingers, and her had on me, was... insane. She spread me even further apart before swirling her tongue around my clit, eyes flicking up at me for approval. She knows I'm the most sensitive there, always whining whenever she tease' me.
"Oh my god, that feels so god Ash." You whine, being teased to extreme. She pushed two fingers in me, making everything blur. Without a second thought, she moved her tongue inside of me harder, fingers moving across my clit in a blur. I cum moments later with a cry, forcing my flower against her face, and she takes the opportunity to catch every last drop of cum i spills. She moves her body up to me, and lay at my side.
"I love you so much okay? You're so fucking special, don't you dare doubt that."
(A/N: I'm sorry it's short and sad, And I kinda had a hard time making it. Remeber I will ALWAYS be right here if you need to talk about something, tell me your story okay? You'all are so fucking beautiful, i literally stalk you all.
Suicide hotline:
1.888.760.1547
I don't know what country you're in, but please call this number if you don't want to talk to me.
