Piece of my heart

Chapter 23

لماذا أنت ليس لك (why are you not you)
❤️❤️❤️
ومما يجعل لي وليس لي (and making me not me)

AMMAR
I woke up early the next morning. It was Fajr time and they were no mosques nearby so I just prayed home. I saw her still sleeping and her alarm was ringing so loudly but she didn't move. I went up to her after praying to wake her up too and to see if she was ok.

I checked her forehead and she was so hot. She was running a high temperature. Because of her so much stress taking and crying she had fever. I woke her up.. Sofia... Sofia. But she didn't reply.

I sat next to her on the bed and touched her hand telling her to wake up but she didn't budge. In fact she held my cold hand tighter and hers was burning. I took her onto my lap and tried waking her up. After a while she woke up with flu and coughing and a temperature and as soon as she realized she was in my arms she moved away pushing me indirectly and faced the other side.

I called her, "Sofia, Sofia why did you sleep on the sofa after me refusing you and giving you clear instructions."

She just ignored me. Well I told her, "Sofia face me, I want an answer from you, and do you know you have fever. You are sick."

She answered me - Well shouted at me, "First of all, leave me alone and second, don't make a habit of carrying me please. And I am physically sick but you are mentally sick."

The words on my face well she was not facing me still. I went the other side. And she was crying. I sat beside her.
And I told her, "Sofia, stop being stubborn. You are sick. Go eat and I will give you medicine and it is fajr prayer time."

She didn't answer but headed directly to the washroom from the other side of the bed totally ignoring me which pinched me.

I went to take a nap and I didn't see her after that till 7 am. I woke up and went downstairs in my pajamas to take some food and medicine for Sofia who was sleeping.

When I reached downstairs the kids came to me including my sisters and their age mates telling me in fact forcing me to go swim with them, so early in the morning. I saw Zayed ready too, I guess they forced him too and Zayed's brother Shahid too and I was the only one left.
My mom came and told me to go but I told her about Sofia's condition and she forced me to go and that she would take care of her lovely daughter in law.

Later I saw Sofia come down. She was looking much better now. She saw me going to swim but she totally ignored me not even a Salam. We went swimming and some of the women, after breakfast came outside to sit under the sun and rest. Sofia was there too. I was stealing glances at her and I could see the pain in her.
My sisters called her to come swim and teased her that I was waiting for her but she just smiled for the sake of smiling.

I saw Adeel run up to her crying and forcing her to come swim. I called Adeel and asked him what was wrong. He said my nephew and Zayed's nephew were playing without him and were ignoring him hence he wanted Sofia to come play with him.

I told him his sister was sick so I would play with him. And I saw him smile and be happy again. And apart from him I saw someone else smile, she was sad seeing Adeel cry but when he smiled she smiled too.

I was getting to know my 'wife' better. I carried Adeel and he was hugging me and he even put a cap on me but my eyes were somewhere else. Looking at someone else and mind was thinking of something else and heart was becoming someone else's - Sofia.

SOFIA
I heard someone call me but faintly. I felt my head ache, my nose block, my throat in pain and I was just so sick. I woke up on a cold touch on my hand and I found myself in his lap. My 'unfaithful heart' wanted to stay their forever but my soul and me didn't allow it. I moved away pushing him because I didn't care now. He was talking to me and I was ignoring him.

But for the sake of Allah, I talked to him and he was my husband I couldn't disrespect him though I was still hurt and angry. He had carried me on the bed again, I noticed that. And why was he sacrificing ?? It wasn't a big deal to sleep on the same bed. We were husband and wife but maybe he wanted to give me space and time.

I answered him giving him my back and he came to me from the front side. And still talked, he realized I was sick and had high fever but I was too egoistic to give in to him so I ignored him and went to the washroom. When I came out, I found him asleep and I slept too.

It was 8, I had overslept kind of and I saw my mother in law putting a wet cloth on my forehead and my mother sitting next to me holding my hand.

I woke up and said Salam to both of them and I hugged both of them too with all the intensity. I wanted to cry to my mom and tell her everything but I couldn't afford to hurt her. She was too precious...

I told my mother in law not to disturb herself but she insisted and she said I was her fourth daughter. I kissed her forehead and thanked her. Later I took a bath and met Hudaa downstairs. She tried to cheer me up by takimg selfies and taking me to the beach and we could see the sea which was beautiful in the morning.

We then returned back and I went to the kitchen to help. But I was told to go rest, forced to rest but I didn't want to be bedridden so Hudaa suggested that those who are not busy go outside and enjoy take a sunbath.
I got to know Ammar was swimming and I didn't want to face him so I refused the idea but Hudaa wouldn't listen to me and I was forced again.
We went outside and I saw him stealing glances at me, I guess my feelings had frozen for him because I was just avoiding him, my heart was now becoming faithful.

After a while a small Adeel came running to me crying. And I couldn't bear to see my little brother sad but I couldn't help it he was asking something impossible, he was forcing me to go swim or play with him because he had no one to play with, I guess his language was a problem with the other kids. Zahra was with her friends and I knew she would never want to be distracted for a little brother. 'Teens...'

I was looking for something to tell Adeel when Ammar called him and told him something which made him smile. He carried him and Adeel was hugging him but he's so called fake attention was on me. Why... why.. Was he trying to prove his greatness.

But when I saw my baby smiling I couldn't help it but smile. My unfaithful heart again was feeling, awakening the heart beats again. I felt like he cared about my family, he cared for me.