The Joke's On You, Bats! [ 𝙱𝚊𝚝𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚇𝙹𝚘𝚔𝚎𝚛 ]

Life Is A Joke

Harley worried herself to death. This wasn't the mad man she fell in love with. This was a shell, a husk of someone who didn't care. Her heart ached, her head hurt.

When he came home the other night, she thought she'd get a beating. But instead, the Joker shuffled on into a room and laid on the floor. There was a dark, tired air about him so she left him be.

The next day, he was still in that room, uncomfortable looking and pathetic. She ached, for her love always had a smile on his face. He always seemed to be planning something, his mind was always going. But right now, he seemed to be in a deep space, completely oblivious of everything around him.

Absolutely depressed.

But what could she do? He'd be mad if she tried to cheer him up, she knew so. Against all odds, against even her instincts, she ventured into the room and sat beside his crestfallen being.

He didn't say anything, so that was a plus. But he didn't acknowledge her either.

"Puddin', what's wrong?" She dared ask.

He was silent for a long time. So quiet, she didn't even know if she asked anything at all.

"Do you know why you're here, Harley?" He asked in response, not moving at all.

"Well, because I love you! And you saved me from a mundane life working in the asylum!"

He curled his upper lip in disgust,"I don't even remember that."

She stayed quiet, not knowing what to say. Her heart always fell when he talked like that, but she knew it was because he felt the need to be guarded. She knew he'd been hurt in his life and he needed a persona to take all the hits. If only he let his guard down long enough so she could heal his wounds.

"How do you stay so happy with such a shitty guy like me? You never fail to help me even when I push you away. You never fail to see the good in me, when those pieces are dead. I don't understand."

Her eyes watered, so he did notice her valiant love. She flopped on top of him, not caring if he lashed out at her. She needed his reassurance that all these years weren't in vain.

He tensed, feeling like a corned animal, but let her have this moment.

"I do all these things because I love you! I know this isn't really who you are. You're a kind gentleman who has lost his way because the world didn't give him a chance. But I will always give you a chance! I promise, puddin'!" She sniffled, nuzzling against his shoulder.

He growled,"I'm sorry, darling, but this isn't some fairy tale. This is who I am, in the purest form. I am a monster and you do your best to remember that." He pushed her off and stood up.

Looking up at him, she felt her heart race,"Then that's fine. I'm completely ok with loving the monster within you!"

He sighed,"This is how you see your life, huh? Loving someone who will never love you back?"

"I know you're capable of love! I know one day you'll come back to me and you'll confess all the feelings you have for me. I just know it!"

The Joker laughed. He bellowed until his lungs ached for an airful. His stomach hurt from the intensity of his howling laughter. He wiped the tears that were squeezed from his eyes.

"You-You believe that, do you?" He asked after calming down.

She pouted,"Yes..."

He grinned ferally,"Let me tell you something. I am not capable of anything! I am the natural disaster of this world, the chaotic handler! I write the tragedy and dish it out. I have no room for feelings or anything else. I have no time for this."

With that, he left her and everything he thought he believed in. The world wasn't meant to have him and he wasn't meant to have the world.

‿෴🦇෴‿

Bruce felt his heart come undone. How could he have let this happen?? How could he have invited his arch nemesis into his sanctuary? If only he didn't, Jason wouldn't be injured and he wouldn't have been..

He hadn't even told Alfred what was going on.

He had a thought, what if he did? The old butler usually gave solid advice.

Alfred, getting tired of being old and getting old from being tired, gardened. Gardening felt like the closest thing to his youth. When the Waynes still lived, when Bruce was still just an heir and had his whole life ahead of him.

Any negative thoughts were gone when he touched the earth. He could lose all thought and feel better about any situation. Every petal on every flower was a negative thought turned into a positive outlook. He sat on his knees, admiring his work. Of course it wasn't professional, it was more natural.

The sun didn't burn his neck for the sun hat he wore. He had on jeans since this was dirty work and slacks were not meant for outside lesiure.

"Alfred."

He startled and looked up at Bruce, the sunlight almost covering the other's look of distress. He stood up and gestured for Bruce to follow.

"What seems to be the problem, sir?"

Bruce followed and wondered how to tell him. He worried his lower lip in thought.

Alfred took his silence as admiration to his work. He sat down at the patio table and looked at the garden as well.

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

Bruce looked over at what he was talking about.

"Ah, yes, it is rather splendid. But, Alfred, I need to ask for advice."

Alfred took off his sun hat, took a rag from his pocket and wiped his sweaty brow.

"Alright, sir. Get on with it."

Bruce sighed,"I think I've done an idiotic thing. Well, no. I know I've done it. I just.. I couldn't help myself. I was intrigued and fascinated. I think I still am. But that's beside the point. I fear I've-"

"Oh, I see! You've gone and found yourself a lovely lass, have you? I'm sure she's fine. Wait.. Have you used protection?" Alfred's eyes got big,"She's not.. pregnant, is she? I always tried to give you the talk, but you always tell me to stop. I even tried showing you with a bana-"

"Alfred please! It's not that." Bruce shook his head, wanting to smile but the situation didn't call for any of that.

"It's not anything like that. It's something I never thought would happen."

Alfred didn't speak, urging Bruce to go on.

"I.. I think I fell in love with the Joker."