The Joke's On You, Bats! [ 𝙱𝚊𝚝𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚇𝙹𝚘𝚔𝚎𝚛 ]

Fatherhood

The next morning, Alfred entered Bruce's room and wasn't shocked to see the bed sheets untouched. He sighed softly, looking at the tray of breakfast items in his hands.

With a butler's grace, he glided down the stairway that lead to the secret entrance of the Batcave. He traveled further into the shadows, poked his head in to look at the cave then continued onward to the spare bedroom.

He opened the door and paused. The bed sheets were tangled, as though someone- two someones- were snuggling side by side. He raised an eyebrow then proceeded to venture further in. Opening the bathroom door, he sighed at the soapy mess that was evident though it dried.

"What on earth was Bruce doing last night?"

‿෴🦇෴‿

The Joker hummed and picked at his clothes, finding lint and flicking it off. He'd watch the little pieces float till he couldn't track them. He groaned, leaning back into the old swing, the chains squealed in an unappealing way.

"Batsy, what are we doing here?"

Bruce looked over at the Joker, his batsuit on. The sunlight made his skin stick to the armor in a gross way, but thankfully he wore the lightest armor he had. Even his suit was a light gray, the Joker voiced his surprise when seeing him change into it.

"Since when did you have other bat skins?!"

"Since crime never sleeps, even in the daylight."

"I am looking for evidence on a missing child."

The Joker yawned, bored out of his mind. He'd been watching the Bat staring at the ground muttering for at least an hour already. He needed stimuli, and what better stimuli than his Batsy pal?

"Bats, I wanna play~" he whined, kicking his feet, making a small cloud of dirt. He looked around the abandoned playground, scratched his chin thoughtfully.

"Why would a kid even be here?"

"Innocence, boredom, their parents left them here, there are a number of reasons." The Bat said calmly, he scanned areas where any hair may be found. He stooped down and lifted a strand of blonde hair.

"Well that's stupid. If I ever had a kid, I wouldn't leave them at a dump like this." The Joker snarled,"I mean, look at this place! The seats are practically pissed on, there's god damned rust on the grass -seriously, how?!- and I've seen a few rapid dogs running around."

"You're in a good mood today," The Bat noted. He analyzed the hair with the high tech scanner in his mask.

Anabelle Reed

Age: 11
Eye color: Green
Hair color: Blonde

A little picture popped up as well, he looked at her with her smile and innocent eyes. He hit a button on his wrist to clear away the information, his eyes focused on the Joker.

The crazy man was ranting and raving about parents and their stupidity, it was odd seeing him so worked up about something that would otherwise seem trivial for him. But then again, there were things the Dark Knight had no idea about when it came to the clown.

"Joker, you almost sound like a parent yourself," he observed.

The Joker stopped mid sentence and glared over at the Bat, sarcastically smirking.

"Oh, you don't say?"

"Are you?" He asked, horrified.

The mad man sighed and looked up at the sky, his body slumped in a defeated way. He smiled.

"I almost had a child, Batsy. We knew that it was going to be a little girl and everything."

"We?"

"Yeah, Harley and I," his cold eyes had a gloss to them, he gazed at the Bat with a sad puppy look.

"She was going to be a Joker Junior, I was going to teach her how not to be a stupid henchwench and how to be independent and glorious." He bit his lip in approval,"Then, when she was older, we'd both kill Harley and run this god forsaken city."

The Bat's eyes widened, How would this world be with two Jokers?

"So what happened?" He queried.

"We were fighting one day, and Harley was so mad at me, she knew the one thing that would set my soul on fire. She KNEW what she was doing," his clenched his fists together tightly.

"She went to the doctors and had an abortion."

The Bat stared at the other man, he was unsure of what to say exactly and had no idea if he should comfort him. So he stayed frozen in place.

"What happened after?"

"I almost killed her, I, I almost killed her and I thought of setting her on fire, but I didn't. She went to the weed lady's and stayed a whole month, I thought she was gone for good. But then she showed up one night and slowly started to try and make me forgive her."

He shrugged,"It's useless. She's even more dead to me than anything I've ever hated. It was her choice and all, but I still think of what could have been."

He giggled,"But I did do away with those doctors. Such remarkable fireworks that day." He smiled, reminiscing happily in a morbid way.

The Bat tried to keep his cool, he had no reason to get worked up over something old. But he couldn't ignore the fact the other could kill so easily. He sighed,"Well, I hope you don't plan on having anymore."

The Joker smirked, a hideous twist in his face,"Oh, Batsy, you don't say?"