Chapter Fourteen: Inside Out

13.5K 412 21
                                    

Chapter Fourteen: Inside Out

Carson:

You remember how when you were a kid your parents always used to warn you on what not to do?  'Don't touch the stove, you'll burn your hand.' or how about 'Don't cross the street yet, you have to look both ways.' I used to take those minor warnings to heart, but lately I've been craving the hot stove and the probability of getting hit by a truck. Why? Lux Hamilton has had me losing my mind. At most moments of that day my mind can't help but stray to how we hook up. How we can make those last  fifteen minutes last a little bit longer than normally

I can honestly say that I've never felt like this. I've never felt so eager to see someone or talk to someone or even touch someone. She makes being potentially burned somewhat worth it. But, in the back of my mind I can feel all the questions creeping up on me. What is this really? Do we have a future together? And what about my dad? Seeing as he is a bishop I couldn't imagine that going too well. Why the hell did things have to be this hard?

I finally arrived home from Lux's house ignoring the questioning expressions on my brother's face. I never once questioned his love life and... well we all know how that went. I climbed up the stairs of my three story house bypassing all of the toddler toys strewn about the floor. My nieces and nephew are over here every other weekend and my brother still forgets to pick up after them. Sometimes I'll never know what I'm getting into when I walk into that the house. I made it to my bed room admiring the pastel pink accents and the clean white walls. Did I mention I was a bit of a germaphobe in that sense. 

I sat down at my vanity and began styling my hair for my father's charity event. I'd almost forgotten all about it due to the heavy make out session via Lux. I wrapped my hair into a crowned bun softening my features. I glanced at her from the corner of my eye noting her smiling and her sun-kissed locks. Everyone claimed that I looked like her, but I never saw the resemblance. She tended to haunt me on occasions like this. Occasions where I'm supposed to be her carnation, her familial clone, her doppelganger. Her clear ocean eyes always judging me from afar.

I slipped on my plum pencil skirt dress, just barely getting the zipper up my back. I huffed and stared plainly at my reflection. Nothing special, nothing like her... No. I marched out of the room before I allowed her to pick me apart even more. I waited for my father downstairs while my brother played GTAVin the living room. He got the pleasure of no longer attending these thing after the birth of his two 'get out of jail free cards'.

"You look nice," He mumbled in between chomps. I shook my head and sat on the love seat across from him.

"Well, that was the look I was certainly going for." I replied blandly. I watched distantly as another car crashed into a bus, whilst concentrating on the ticking clock.

"Ohh!" He shouted as he made a sharp turn just barely missing a large truck.

"You'd think you would know how to drive in this game when you have a license in real life." I jabbed.

"It's not even my fault half of the time. It's as if there are no rules of the road."

"Yeah, okay."  I leaned back into the sofa closing my eyes trying to block out the sound effects. In the mean time maybe I can catch a small nap...

***********************************

"Carson," I heard a distant voice call. I squirmed slightly not really in the mood to get up.

"Carson!" The voice called more impatiently while tapping my shoulder, forcing me to open my eyes. My father's dark eyes bore into mine. He shook his head and served me his hand to stand with.

”Clean your face, girl!" And he shoved me in the direction of the bathroom. I huffed stomping off to 'fix' myself. I smoothed my hair back down and reapplied my lip gloss. If only being my father's arm candy wasn't such a tedious job. I followed my father out into the town car whilst he was having an extensive conversation with his assistant. It felt as if the car was crawling to the banquet hall, coupled with the glaring silence and the occasional phone call, it became one of the longest drives in my life. We finally arrived at the town's banquet hall surrounded by a small group of paparazzi flashing their cameras. I stood there posing as I should, a slight smile touching my lips, as if I was elated to be photographed. My father motioned me inside the hall, where tons of adults scattered the dance floor and the tables.

"Carson, now I'm going to talk business I don't want any trouble out of you,okay? You are only permitted to one alcoholic drink, is that clear?"

"Yes, sir" I replied glumly. He walked off leaving me to my own devices. I wandered around a bit taking tube occasional sip from flask. I needed all the liquid courage I could get to deal with this night. The band played mostly boring classical songs with the arbitrary selection of a modern day instrumental. I feeling kind of tipsy at that point, things were starting to look a little dizzying.

"Hey, are you alright?" I deep inquiring voice asked. I was sitting in the back lounge area, having know clue on how I got there.

"Huh?" I rubbed my head trying to remember who I knew with that voice...

"Carson, it's me Matthew, Matthew Carraway." That's it! Matthew Carraway. Lawyer wannabe and extremely sexy. He was tall with thick golden brown hair and clear hazel eyes. They nicknamed him the bronze god at our school. He has been obsessed with me for years, always hinting to me that we should go out and get to know one another better. But, I was always quick to turn him down, not wanting to get anywhere my father's political games.

"Hey! How are you?" I said as fast and as bright as I could.

"I'm alright, but how are you?" He emphasized. I shook my head and shuddered. At this present moment I wasn't feeling that great.

”Uhh, not well, I d-don't think," I slurred. I giggled some and slumped further in my seat.

"Oh, okay. Uh, did your dad tell you that he was helping my dad run for senate?" I shrugged nonchalantly, this wasn't really a conversation I cared to be having.

"Well, that's nice. I'mm just gonna g-oo now, I really have to be somewhere." I sat myself up and lifted out of the chair, albeit a little wobbly, I still got there.
v
"You need some help-"

"Don't touch me!" I screeched. Everyone in that section stopped and looked at me. God I hate when people stare at me! I marched off feeling everyone's eyes peeling into my back. I have to get out of here, now. I skirted around everyone trying not to bring anymore attention to myself.

I finally made it to the door, catching my breath. I shivered as winter was just around the corner. Warm tears pierced my eyes, but I refuse to be that sad, emotional drunk. I pulled my phone out of my scrolling through my contacts finding anyone to take me home.

Ian..? Uhh,no

Jessica....? Not in the mood for her voice.

Lux..? I mean it's breaking a rule, don't ask for favors, but I can't sit here another second. I hit call before I changed my mind...

**************************

A/N:

I know this is kind of a boring chapter but it gives some more insight on Carson's life. Next chapter we well pick back up right here but in Lux's POV. Hope you all enjoyed it!

Falling for You (Lesbian Love Story)Where stories live. Discover now