Alpha Brothers - The Trickster (book 4)

Chapter 26

Chapter 26
Bleu
The rain poured outside, hitting against the glass windows and making everything go dark. The small fire that burned in the fireplace, crackled wanting to burn bright like a bush fire. Everyone gathered around me or had small worried conversations in the corner of the room.
I couldn't speak to anyone, I couldn't even look at them. Just stared at the corner of the coffee table, praying it would give me the answers.
Graham sat next to me. My hand in his was the only comfort he could give as much as I wanted him to do more. But what could he do. He was no witch and whatever connection he had to magic was gone. Not even true loves kiss could bring back my magic.
"Here, Bleu," Liv said, sitting down next to me, offering out a mug of coffee.
"I don't want anything," I mumbled through a blocked nose and clotted up throat.
"You should drink something," she told me.
I shook my head and didn't answer her.
She quickly got the idea and sat it down on the coffee table.
"Well, it's just there when you want it."
I nodded, a form of a thank you, before she pattered the top of my head and stood.
"How could your ancestors do that to you?" Amy asked from where she was curled up in Archie's arms on the other lounge, "side with someone that uses witches."
I swallowed at the word. I wasn't a witch anymore. The very thought broke my heart. My magic was everything that made me, me. Without it, who was I?
Remembering, Amy's question, I answered, "Harrison struck a deal with them. If he got me back, he would let the other witches go. Without my magic, I'm vulnerable. They agreed that when I go back to Harrison, I'll get my magic back and for punishment, serve ten years with him till they'll get me out."
"But your one of them," Archie said, "why would they do that to you."
I bit my lip, trying not to regret my decision. I did it for Graham and his family, right?
"They were angry with my relationship with Graham. They told me to choose," the lump in my throat grew ten times bigger, cutting off any chance of speaking, "when I did that spell, um, I made my decision."
"So this is all my fault," Graham said squeezing my hand.
"It's no one's fault, Graham," Callum told him.
That was supposed to be my line, but I couldn't say it. I didn't blame Graham, truly. I didn't blame anyone.
"Bleu, I thought -," he paused, "I thought we should call your parents."
"And tell them what?" I asked, finally looking at him, "hi, I'm the daughter that's been missing for three years, oh by the way, the ancestors took my magic away because I'm a traitor to the witch coven. No, Graham, no."
I didn't mean to snap, I really didn't. But if I wasn't sure about contracting them before I was now. I couldn't let them see me like this. I had turned away from my coven. More like been forced to. But nothing could take away the hole that was inside of me.
"Can you leave?" I asked Graham, as nicely as I could.
But the pain in his eyes only made mine fill with tears.
"Bleu, I don't think you should be alone," Allie said from behind me.
I didn't answer her. I was too glued to Graham's face. God I was hurting him. I knew it. But I couldn't make him feel better, I didn't know how to.
"Come on, we'll leave too," Callum said, shooing everybody out.
"Graham," he called.
Graham stayed still, trying to work out why I was sending him away. But whatever was going on with me, was nothing to do with him.
"Please," I begged, dropping a few tears.
Graham slowly nodded, finally standing and walking over to the door.
Just before he got to the door, he turned to me, "I'll be in our room, when you need me."
I nodded, squeezing my eyes shut not being able to look at him anymore. He shut the door leaving me in a dark room with the only light was by the fire.
I cried uncontrollably. I couldn't stop. I didn't know how to.  Rocking back and forth on my heels, I squeezed my arms, trying to get any feeling inside of me. None. I felt nothing. Just numb from the sudden lost.
My tear filled my eyes landed on the burning fire. I should feel something from it. Strength, power. But I felt nothing.
Kneeling, I crawled over to the fire place. I called on the strength within me, trying to move the tiny flames. Nothing. It was truly gone.
"Bleu?"
I looked up and found Malcolm poking his head through.
"I thought you would like some company," he said coming through.
I fell into tears, once again.
"Come on, Bleu," he said, kneeling down beside me, "wipe those tears."
"I can't," I cried, "It hurts, Malcolm."
"The hole that's inside of you?" He asked, "it's eatin' you up inside."
I nodded, trying to breathe through my mouth.
I frowned, surprised that he knew what it felt like it.
"How did -."
"I lived five years without my wolf, remember?"
Oh, I had forgotten. I guess it was the same thing. And unlike Graham, he understood.
"I don't know what's worse," I started, "living without my magic or living without Graham."
"Your not seriously thinkin' about it?" He asked.
I shook my head, wiping my nose. But my point still stands. I didn't know if I could live without my magic.
"That hole that you feel, it'll get smaller. I promise," he said starting to poke the fire with the poker, "One day, you'll start to feel better and somethin' will replace that need. Graham, maybe a baby in a few years."
I couldn't help but sadly giggle as I remembered what we talked about yesterday. Little werewitches.
"That thought seemed to be filled with so much happiness yesterday. Werewitches," he chuckled, humouring me, "how can I look after something so pure like this?"
"I thought the same thin'," he admitted, "You'll feel better, I promise. This is just a little bump in the road."
"More like a big bump," I muttered, making him chuckle a little.
"Can I give you some advice?" He asked, placing the poker down.
I nodded, taking all I can get.
"Don't turn away from Graham, that was my mistake and I lost everythin'."
"How can I speak to him?" I asked him, "I'm scared that the person he loves went away when my magic did."
"Then use him to get her back. Anchor yourself to him. You anchored your magic to him, right?" I nodded, "well, anchor your soul to him. Use him to keep you, you."
I nodded, taking his advice on board.
"Was Tarna the thing that filled in your hole?" I asked.
"More like the person drivin' the bulldozer," I giggled at that, "but aye. If it wasn't for her, I would still be up in that attic."
"You don't think your siblings would have got you out?"
He shook his head, "I let my hole grow a lot bigger than you will."
"Will I?" I asked unsure of myself.
"Aye, your strong, Bleu. Why do you think Harrison wants you? You're the strongest witch from your time. You can do anythin'."
"You really think so."
"Aye, I do. And you're goin' to get through this. With Graham's help."
I smiled feeling a little bit better. If I believed anyone, it would be him.