Atem x Reader ☆ A Shadow in the Dark

Chapter 8

"You don't have to go."

These words... so delicate as to hold all reasoning. They're said in a whisper, and nothing more. A plea meant to persuade me. I couldn't allow myself to give in to this, no matter how much my lover begged me. I felt guilt at the time, but no one could stop me from this fate, not even myself. My queen didn't deserve any of this. I only wanted her happiness, and even if impossible for myself, I would be content only if she was kept alive. That is why I must go. Even if we're worlds apart, I can always walk in comfort, for I know this isn't goodbye.

"If I don't go... the world will be lost."

Truth is spoken here. Those eyes that stare back at mine with such sadness... I could see the meaning behind them. An intent to protect me, mixed with a defeated pain. She knew as well as I what had to be done. I wouldn't let this be the end though. Before I was gone, I would show her the full extent of my love. My hands traveled to her face. I held it gently while I allowed my thumbs to stroke her cheek. I lowered my head until our foreheads came into contact. It was my breath against hers, with a feeling of satisfaction. This is all I saw of that moment, but it gave me a small clue as to why I was here. For the fate of the world, I gave up my life... I was sure of this to be true. However, if I had given myself for the world, my spirit should have passed on, and yet my soul remains trapped here. I'm bound by a sense of duty. I play prisoner in this unforeseen darkness. I was worried this would happen. I find an answer, a key memory, and yet... I'm consumed by a longing for more. The answers leave me with a taste of dissatisfaction. Who put me here if not myself? Or perhaps I'm correct to assume it was by my own fault. I shake my head miserably.

"I have to remember...!"

It isn't of use right now, and my screams only signal my sorry state. With this, the darkness taunts me further. They think by showing me such things I'll get caught up in pleasure, and too late realize what I can't have. In this way they make fun of me. I know better now. They think they have me in their control, believing me to be nothing more than an empty vessel; a suitable entertainment. What they don't realize are the things only I know of myself. With a strong mind and will, I won't succumb to their likes. These images provide me with a sense of security, and perhaps hope... a small shred of hope. Whatever I decide to believe, they're my  thoughts only. As exposed as I am, my wandering mind is the only shield I have. The one thing unable to be read... or so I think at the time. In any case, I needn't worry about it. What I do know is that I have to keep walking. As long as purpose is found elsewhere, it's pointless to stay still. I won't fuel the darkness; this I refuse.

"You can follow me," I say, "But you can't reach me."

With this, I walk off into coverage. I leave behind an echo of my voice, and this message to be painted on every wall. It's a small warning, but the intentions behind it hold firm, as do I. Just keep walking, I tell myself, Everything will be alright. I make myself a new shadow along the wall, which picks up the movement of my lean frame. A shadow hidden by the dark goes unnoticed, just like I, who refuse to be found. There is little light here, further representing the meaning behind this. In my case, I consider there to be two shadows, with the identity of the other being left for me to realize. I turn my head back to look over my left shoulder as I walk. My eyes scan nothing, but seeing isn't everything in this place. I've proven that I can manage here, and as long as the current isn't reversed, I'll find what I'm looking for.

I stand tall and still when facing my enemy. With so many ways to go, it's a wonder how one doesn't get lost here. But, with all things considered, I was lost from the beginning. No matter where I go, it'll be the same. With this thinking, options seem like less of a problem, and more of a convenience. It's rather dull, but I could go to my left and get the same result as if I had gone to the right. I have nothing to fear, as I'll gladly accept my death when ready. When is ready? I can't answer such a question. However, if I'm taken after, and not before... all I require: that my memory return before I go. All I want is the knowledge of this place. Until then, I won't even dwell on the subject.