The Wrong direction (one direction Fan Fic)

chapter 17

Again, nothing really to say except, thank you all so much for the support of this story!  It means a lot to me! (ha ha that is a song by day to remember- look it up if you have never heard it)

But yeah, we are up too over 9,000 reads which is huge! Thank you guys!

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Louis P.O.V

"Look Lou," He replied.  "Something's happened.  I think you should come to the hospital and see for  yourself." Liam whispered on the other end of the phone. 

I froze.  I didn't reply; I couldn't.  My breath hitched in the back of my throat.  I opened my mouth, but no words came out.  What could be so horrible that he could not tell me over the phone?  Had Harry tried to kill him self?  No!  He said he wouldn't.  He said that he would stop hurting himself- he said that he wanted to live.  He want to live because I made his life worth living.  

He wanted to live before I hurt him.  Before I called him a stupid and pathetic.  He wanted to live before I broke him.

I couldn't stay on the phone line anymore. The pain in my heart became more than what I could handle.  I hung up and dropped to my knees in shame.  Guilt hit me hard.  I had hurt him and I ran.   I ran because I couldn't look in his eyes and see all the pain that I had caused. I ran because I was a coward.

I had been no better than what had broken him in the first place. In my attempts to try to help him, I had just hurt him even more in the process. He must have done something horrible to end up in the hospital.  Maybe he cut right in front of Liam or even over dosed.  Or maybe he had tried to jump in front of a car and got hurt.  How long had I been gone? An hour?  Maybe two?

So much could happen in a hour, but I refused to think that Harry was dead.  I cast that thought out of my mind.  Liam over exaterated everything. I'm sure it couldn't be that bad.

I took in a deep breath.  What happened between us?  Harry and I had been like peanut butter and Jelly.  We were inseparable.  We were best mates.  When did that change?  When did it change where he had to hide everything from me?  When did it change where he couldn't look me in the eyes and tell me the truth; where he couldn't tell me what was really going on inside that head of his.

Maybe he had tried to but I just missed it. 

My stomach began to feel queasy and I began to feel nausea.  My head hurt and my throat felt dry.  I slid down to the ground.  After  I had said that to Harry, I just ran.  I ran as far and as fast as I could.  Now, where was I?  I was alone, lost, had no friends left, and was left in what looked like an ally way of some sorts in a strange town where I had never been.  I began to feel scared. 

Is this how Harry felt every night when he would stay up slitting his wrists?  Did he feel like no one cared for him?  Is this how it feels to be alone? 

I shivered at the though.  Where was I? 

I pulled out my phone to try to find directions or call a cab but the second it flashed on, it flashed shut.  It had died. 

I buried my head in my hands.  Harry- he had been all that I had been thinking of these past few days.  He was in my mind 24\7.   I wanted him to feel loved.  I wanted him to feel like he didn't have to fight his addictions alone.  I wanted him to know that he was never alone.  But after what I did.....he could never trust me again. 

My mind wondered to the phone call. Liam had sounded desperate- almost as if he had been crying right before he talked to me.  Something was wrong with Harry- something had happened and I had a feeling in the pit of my stomach that it had been bad. No matter how much I tried to deign it, I knew that something was wrong.