Fighter

Ch. 64

I can't help it, I start to sob uncontrollably as I hit send. This is going to kill Maddox, I don't even want to call and tell him. I'm just glad I don't have to see his face when I tell him. The phone rings twice and Maddox answers.

"Hadley, what's wrong?" He asks after hearing my sobs.

"The baby, come get me." I plead.

"Where are you?"

"The library restrooms." I barely get out.

"I'll be right there, don't move, everything will be okay. What happened?"

"I started bleeding." I say between hiccups.

"I'm going to call 911 okay, kitten, they might get there faster. Then I'll call Dr. Harris."

"No, call Dr. Harris first. I don't want to go with them. I want to be with you." I say getting hysterical.

"Okay, I'll call him and call you right back." He says and hangs up.

"Are you all right?" I hear someone ask.

"No." I say still sitting on the toilet. I don't know how much blood means that the baby is gone but any blood has to be a bad thing. I wanted this baby, I wanted everything. I can’t lose this child it will destroy Maddox and me. There's a knock and I hear a different voice telling me to open the door. But I don't listen and keep crying hysterically for the baby inside of me. My baby, the one whose heartbeat I saw furiously beating just last Friday. What did I do wrong? Why is this happening?

I cry thinking I was going to see and hear that heartbeat in a few more weeks now it could be gone. The numbness I usually keep myself in is no longer there, instead it’s been replaced with a pain so consuming I feel it choking me with grief and sadness. I don't know what I did but I killed our child. How can Maddox ever forgive me? I did too much, I didn't drink enough water. This is my fault and now I'll never get to meet the one person in this world that would pull me and Maddox together. Making us set down roots and begin a family.

I hear yelling in the back of my mind but my cries drown it out for the most part. With my head buried in my hands, I scream. I let out everything, my frustrations, my pain. I feel someone pick my head up but I close my eyes tightly. I don't want to see anything. I don't want to live. I'm being picked up but I don't care, nothing matters to me anymore. It's all over, I've lost everything.

I must have fallen asleep or passed out. I wake up in a hospital bed hooked up to monitors. I look to the side of my bed where I feel my hand being lightly stroked. Maddox looks at me and smiles. I am confused, I don't want him to smile. He needs to be torn up about this like I am.

"Don't smile, don't do that." I say my voice hoarse.

"Hadley, listen to me. The baby is fine."

"What?" I ask unbelieving.

"The baby is fine. Dr. Harris looked and said that the embryo may have implanted itself into the wall of your cervix even more, which could have caused the bleeding. Or it could have been something about your cervix being sensitive and that sex can cause it to bleed. But the baby is alive and everything’s fine."

"The baby's not dead?" I ask in a daze.

"No, our baby is still alive. You’re going to be fine and so is our baby."

I let out a sigh of relief and Maddox kisses my hand. "Don't ever scare me like you did today. Hadley, I swear I almost went crazy seeing you like that. Please, don't ever do that to me again. I won’t be able to handle it."

"I'm so sorry. I just didn't want to live. I thought I killed our baby." I say tears starting to form.

"No more crying. Everything is okay now."

I fall asleep to Maddox rubbing my head.

***************************************************

MADDOX POV

I rub Hadley's head thinking over everything that happened today. Starting with the phone call I thought was going to give me a heart attack.

I hear my phone ring while I'm in a meeting and not caring that I'm interrupting, I answer it when I see its Hadley. I hear her crying loudly, I know something must be horribly wrong. I finally get her to tell me what's wrong and what happened. She tells me where she is and this whole time I am running to my car. When she said she didn't want an ambulance I knew I needed to talk to Dr. Harris right away.

I called Dr. Harris and he told me to get her in immediately. I never knew what real fear was until I walked into that bathroom. There was the librarian and two other women trying to talk to Hadley but by the looks and the screams I heard, she was not responding to them. Hadley's screams will haunt me forever. They were so sorrowful and laced with pain. I could feel my skin prickle and my hair stand up on the back of my neck. I never want her to ever feel like that again. In the moments I tried to get her to look at me, I could tell she had given up. Hadley my light was no more, she was lost in a dark abyss that I was afraid she would never surface from. Looking at her made me die inside. I felt like a failure, I failed to protect her and our baby.

The longest two hours of my life started at the hospital. Hadley passed out when I was carrying her to my car which was probably for the best. I had to wait outside the exam room waiting for tests to be run and specialists to come look at Hadley and the baby. When I saw Dr. Harris come towards me with a smile, I dropped to my knees. I listen as he tells me Hadley is fine and the baby is alive. I tell him I need to see her and he agrees taking me to the room we are currently in. Hadley will be released tomorrow with strict bed rest for the next few days. The doctors said she had a manic episode and on top of that a panic attack causing her to black out. I look down at my angel and I vow that given half a chance I will hold, kiss and touch her every day. I can't go back to living without her. My world is hers and my life is in her womb. I can't lose either. I will never take for granted a moment I have with either of them.

This chapter is for keeper21...take care of yourself girly!!!