Before the Dawn

Chapter Thirteen

Confusion. That's the first thing I feel when I drag open my heavy eyelids. Sunlight filters into the unfamiliar room through closed shades bringing light into the otherwise dark room. I squeeze my eyelids shut and reopen them several times to clear my blurry vision but it's no use.

Fear comes next. I'm paralyzed. I try to curl my fingers and wiggle my toes but nothing happens, nothing at all. Panic seizes me. Oh my Gods, what am I going to do? I'm trapped in a hotel room gods know where with an immortal murderer and I can't even move. What kind of sick joke is this?

I look around the room in panic. Tears glisten in my eyes making it that much harder to see. I don't want to die here, I think as the first tear leaks from my eye.

"Now, now, Thanatos, don't cry. It's terribly unattractive,"  says a mockingly sympathetic voice.

I look up with wide, frightened eyes just in time to see Theo walk out of one of the dark corners of the room. If I could move, I would have scrambled away from him but I can't.  All I can do is lay here and stare as Theo moves closer and closer.

The bed I lay on groans as he sits down. The dark god smiles absently as he brushes a stray lock of hair from my face. I keep my eyes steely but my insides tremble with fear. His hooded, smoldering eyes stare down at me with a dark intensity, like a predator eyeing its prey.

"You are so beautiful," he whispers as he trails his burning fingers along my face. My bottom lip trembles as he does so. I pray that means that I'm beginning to be able to move again.

Theo closes his eyes for a moment and when he opens them again there's so much pain in them that I almost feel sorry for him.

"Why did you accept his Warrior's Oath, Thanatos? Was I not good enough for you?" The broken light in his eyes suddenly fires up. He clutches my hand even tighter in his. "I'm good enough for you now, though. I'll prove it to you."

His eyes take on a feverish glow. He moves even closer to me  looking desperate for my affection.

"I tried to see you in the Underworld but Arawn wouldn't let me enter." He frowns and looks at me imploringly. "He told me to stay away from you, but how could I? I love you, Thanatos."

A tear leaks out fo the corner of my eye. Theo wipes it away with his thumb tenderly, leaving a scorching trail in his wake. I close my eyes as another tears falls.

"No," I breathe, barely audible.

Theo freezes next to me. I hold my breath, terrified that I might've angered him. His eyes narrow slightly, then soften. He tucks a stray lock of hair behind my ear and, after a slight pause, he dips his head and presses a blistering hot kiss to my forehead. His lips linger there for a moment before he pulls away to look at me.

Shock riddles my brain. Did he. . . did he just kiss me?

"I won't hide my feelings from you, Thanatos. I'll shout them from the roof tops if that's what it takes to get you back." Theo smiles brightly, a mischievous glint in his golden eyes. "I love you," he says, already leaning forward.

With tender affection, Theo kisses my forehead, my eyelids, my cheeks and my nose, murmuring a passionate "I love you" between each kiss. Unable to move, I lay there, powerless against the sun God's affection.

"I. . . love. . . Declan," I choke out, my lips struggling to form the words.

To my immense surprise, Theo smiles at me with pity. He shakes his head at me lightly as if I'm some child that's much too young to grasp what's right in front of my face. "No, you don't," he says with a joyful chuckle, causing me to question his sanity. "You only think that you love him because you were trapped in the Underworld with only him for so long. He's blinded you but he doesn't love you like I do. He treats you like a peasant below his feet. I know how to treat you like the divine goddess that you are. I'll prove my love for you, Thanatos and you will choose me instead of Arawn, I swear it."

For a moment, just a moment, his words move me and I feel like maybe I've been too hard on him. He loved me and I'd just thrown his love away in favor of a far away god that I barely knew. The feeling doesn't last long and all I'm left with is a deep felling of self disgust. How could I think such things about Declan? He's the best thing that ever happened to me. He's not just some handsome stranger that stole my heart. He is the most loving and fiercely protective man or god to ever walk this earth. His passion is unparalleled by any other. This amazing creature loves me and I love him, how could I ever question it?

All Theo is is a fallen god that's trying to tear my love for Declan apart. That is it. . . Right?

I stare up at Theo pleadingly, silently begging him to please let me go and end this game of cat and mouse. I don't want to play anymore. He misreads my look -or doesn't care, either one- and pulls me deeper into his warm embrace. His golden face looms closer and closer over mine and suddenly his lips are on mine and he's kissing me with such a raw passion that it's a wonder that he hasn't burst with the intensity of it. 

Unable to move, I can't stop his advances even though I really, really want to- or, at least, that's what I'm telling myself. The kisses hold no passion on my end. Regardless of Theo's volcanic passion, there is no spark. How could I have ever thought that this god was the one for me? No matter how warm, how handsome or how devoted he is, Theo is not the one I was meant to be with; Declan is.

My unresponsiveness must anger him because a growl vibrates from the back of his throat as he rolls himself on top of me. His kisses rise in intensity as the heat in the room peaks. Back and forth he goes, leaving no part of my neck, jaw or lips untouched by his kisses.

His strong arms encircle my waist, trapping me against his blazing hot body. Sweat beads on my forehead as I'm overwhelmed by his passionate heat.

I can't do this. I can't do this, I repeat to myself like a mantra in my head. Fog clouds my brain, making it nearly impossible to think rationally. Maybe it isn't fog at all. Maybe it's just steam from Theo's fiery kisses, I think with a humorless laugh.

Theo moves his lips from mine only to plant a long trail of heated kisses along my neck.

"No," I breathe out in a shuttering breath. The sun god pays me no mind, instead pressing even more burning kisses to my skin. Undeterred, I say even louder, though it's still barely audible, "stop."

"You don't really want me to stop," he moans arrogantly, finally acknowledging that I've spoken. 

More kisses are brushed across my skin, moving dangerously low. Teasingly, he moves his lips back to mine, easing them apart slowly. In fear of the power he holds over me, I do the only thing that I can do in my situation; I bite his bottom lips as hard as my weakened jaw will let me and I don't let go until I can taste the metallic taste of blood.

With an enraged growl, Theo shoves me away from him clutching his bleeding lip. "You little bitch!" he snarls as he stands up.

Theo turns away, muttering curses under his breath as he paces. He turns back to me suddenly with a very pissed off expression.

"You will choose me, Thanatos," he growls before placing a hand on my chest and shooting another dose of sunlight in me. I jerk backwards from the blow, my insides feeling as though they're on fire. Maybe they are.

"Why me?" I breathe out, dying to know why he wants me of all people so bad.

Theo stops in the doorway, and looks back over his shoulder at me. A hint of a smile tugs at the corners of his lips. "I love the darkness in you," he says simply before shutting the door behind him.

Unable to keep my eyes open for a second longer, I fall into the black abyss of unconsciousness.