Star Fall / Book One (SPN Fan Fiction)

Chapter Twenty-Six

(WARNING:   SAUCY V GRAPHIC SEX SCENE)    (18+ ONLY)

(p.s. Highly advise listening to Retrograde by James Blake while reading lé smut)

Kai picked up all the scattered glass, and washed her blood from the wood panels. Fixing what she could of the items from the shelf, and set them back in their place. Sick and tired of having to keep herself, and her ever growing passion for Dean, at bay. Partially unable to process her own feelings about it at all, since she'd never been romantically involved with anyone before. Falling in love was a taboo subject as a child, out of the question. Her feelings, intensely connected to her relentlessly advanced powers. So much so, that her father worked hard to keep her from any exposure to grand emotion. Following in the inexorable code he had drilled into her. In order to shield the world, and herself, from her own unremitting abilities. And after his passing, she made sure to continue his law. Purposefully avoiding any riveting induced emotions. Therefor, feelings of such passions are something she's far from aquatinted with. The only continued relationship she's ever had was with her father. And Cas. Yet here she was, inundated with emotions of an incomprehensible caliber. Fuck her alpha charged, one track mind, hunter teachings. Fuck her instinctual drive for repression, and emotional isolation. Dean was worth it. The only other time she's ever experienced any level of desire for anyone, was the first day they met. In that cabin in Maine. Right after being booted from Hell and unforgivably spit out onto the surface. And no human since than has ever been able to touch her spirit the way Dean does.

She took off her bloody jacket and put on a pot of coffee, knowing he'd probably be hammered on his return. Anxiously pacing in her third hour of waiting. When the bunker door finally opens. She fretfully stops, entering the foyer headstrong. Watching Dean stagger down the stairs, one morose, inebriated foot, after the other. He lands in full view, nonverbal. Eyes bloodshot, face flushed, knuckles oozing blood. She warily approaches, keeping a safe distance, observing for any sudden movements. Her corded survival knife tucked to the back of her belt, reading the dejected expression on his face. Blatantly avoiding her gaze, he gradually brings forward a low fist...Their universal gesture sent a breath through her still lungs.

She edges closer. Timidly touching his hand, examining it before gingerly pulling him down the hall. Guiding Dean onto the mattress in his room. He sat immobilized, in a catatonic stare. Hoping with his every cell that the floor would simply open up and swallow him whole. Finally turn it all off...After all this time, that's how it comes out. His first 'I love you' and it's riddled in sadistic behavior. Behavior that's not even his own. Once again, he was losing himself...Kai returns with a cup of coffee and a first aid kit. Pulling up a chair to attentively clean his hands. Dabbing an alcohol pad on his scrapped skin. Taking in micro glimpses of his drunken, dissociated state.

"What's happening to me?" His hoarse voice whispers in horror. Her eyes shot up, unable to respond, she didn't really know how. "I-I didn't mean..."

"I know that." She acknowledges. "It's The Mark..." She looks him over as she dries his knuckles, switching hands. Holding him before starting to work. "I shouldn't have antagonized you..I am so sorry." Kyiah genuinely apologizes, feeling the topping guilt of her reactions.

"D-did I throw a glass at you?" He took a breath, stagnant as she moves onto the bed. Glued to him, cautiously sliding a hand under his. His fingers latch to hers in indescribable grief.

"I started this. I pushed you, and I shouldn't have." Seeing she wasn't getting anywhere, Kai follows her gut. "Baby, if you don't think I'm ready, than I just have to trust you." His eyes move up to the wall, fighting to stay away from hers. She drops her tone, her free hand tracing the side of his face, behind his ear and down his neck. "I never should have used your pain against you. Or said those things to you.. Because I do, want to be here, with you. I know, all the things you've done, the things you've been through, for me. And I'm more than grateful you took on this favor for Cas...For me..I never should have made you feel like I wasn't appreciative of you...That you were the bad guy.." Dean clenches his jaw, his gaze still straight ahead. Stirring her to make a daring move, and lean herself against his shoulder. Her thumb affectionately grazing his hand. His eyes close, rolling his head near hers in sorrow. His focus snatched by the blood seeping through the side of her top. Kyiah sneakily adjusts.