Hers Freely

35. Subconscious yearning

Ella

Friends? I gave him a puzzled look. The concept seem almost foreign to me.

"We aren't friends" I stated firmly, not wanting to entertain the idea of letting someone into my carefully guarded world.

"I definitely don't do the friend thing." I added

"Why not?" He asked delicately stroking my hand with his thumb.

"I don't have time to dedicate to a person who in the end will only disappoint." My words laced with a bit of bitterness. My walls were high and thick, built over years of heartache and betrayal.

Jonah raised an eyebrow and flashed me a boyish smile. "Maybe you need to give it a try."

I shook my head, adamant in my belief that solitude was my best friend. "Nope, doing fine alone," I countered, yanking my hand from Jonah's grip. I won't have him witness my vulnerabilities, it's easier to push him away before he could get too close.

I had convinced myself that I was better off alone. The idea of sharing my thoughts and feelings with someone else made me uncomfortable, especially with a wolf.
I had learned from a young age that people were not to be trusted, that friends really don't exist. They would only use you for their own gain and then discard you when they were done. Besides, he was a member of a pack and the Beta at that, he had no understanding of the betrayals I had faced.

But after arriving at the omega cabin, Jonah persisted, his persistence both irritating and endearing. "Well, you surely would do better with a friend, especially a wolf friend," he said playfully as he gestured towards himself.

I couldn't help but chuckle at his comment. " Oh! I'm positive I don't need one of them."

He looks at me with his alluring green eyes and says. "Too late, gorgeous, you already got one. And I must say a very fine specimen, don't you agree?

I couldn't disagree, he was extremely good looking. Above all when he smiled. 

But I narrow my eyes at him, trying to suppress a smile. He laughs this boisterous laugh that made my stomach feel tingly.

Soon, he turns and walks into the darkness , "Goodnight, Ella"

Could I allowed myself to consider the possibility of having a friend like him?

"Stupid Wolf, I whisper a loud. Thinks I'm gonna be his friend." I stood there grinning like a fool. "Huh! Never gonna happen."

I hastily trudge to my room, my weary body aching, habitually evading any lurking wolves in the cabin.  Silently, I closed my door and, as was my nightly ritual, wedged a wooden chair beneath the doorknob.

This gave me a false sense of security, as if a flimsy chair could hamper a wolf's deadly intent. But deep down, I knew the truth: if a wolf wanted to get to me, I would be dead in an instant, a stupid chair wasn't going to stop them.

I changed into my nightgown and burrowed into my blankets, the night air growing colder. As I lay there, my thoughts turned to the Beta. His gentle touch, his disarming smile, seemed to melt away all my worries. A sense of warmth and relaxation washed over me, lulling me into a peaceful slumber.

I could feel his heat near me, his head moved down my neck.  "Ella ,"he muttered against my ear. His strong hands gripping my hips and pulling me against his chest. I sank against him indulging in the sensation of his warm touch.
I moaned as his fingertips trailed softly across my stomach like feathers. The tingles sent shivers down my spine as he leaned in to kiss down my neck with a tenderness that made my heart flutter. Each caress was filled with an intensity that left me breathless, yearning for more.