Her Elysium (Flowers and Keyboards 1) {GirlxGirl}

Chapter 16 - Alex

Currency = Most games have different types of currency, there is the global system that is basically 'money'. Depending on the game this can be a system with bronze, silver and gold or other metal coins, basically Euros and cents, other games use only one type of coin, like how the Japanese Yen works. But on top of that, most games also have special currencies that gamers collect from quests, dungeons, raids and other things and those can be exchanged for special gear and items at specific NPCs.

What? How am I even supposed to answer that? Especially to Fleur... Especially when I have no idea what she thinks about me right now, how she feels about me... Would it ruin even the little bit of friendship we've started to build?

She looks so surprised by her own question, but I can also see the curiosity in her eyes. She does want to know. I don't know why, I don't dare to hope to know why... Arg.

I move in my seat, the hall is filling up with more people, and I don't want to make a scene. "I don't know." It's the best I can give her right now.

She looks at me, her face falling a little, and then she sits back in her seat, staring ahead. The silence stretches between us and I don't know how to fill it. This just got a whole lot more awkward, more awkward even than when she saw me for the first time. Just... It feels like I may have ruined any chance I had at shrugging this off. At acting like the question means nothing to me.

The silence between us keeps stretching and the hall darkens, the screen lighting up, starting to play commercials.

I glance in Fleur's direction and she keeps looking ahead, her eyebrows drawn up and her eyes appear to be looking in the direction of the screen, but I can see how she's not actually seeing any of it.

I gave the wrong answer, didn't I? I lean in and Fleur looks at me, a little surprised. "I'll be right back, need to use the toilet."

She nods, her eyes on my face. "Okay."

"I'll be right back." I stand up and make my way through the rest of the row and then out of the hall. When I'm in the hallway, I take a deep breath, trying to calm my heart a little, and grab my phone. I send a message off to Cerise. 'She asked me if I liked girls more than boys. I totally closed up. Help!'

Then I go to the toilets, locking myself in a cubicle. I can't believe I totally closed up. I can't believe I freaked out like that. I should have just answered with the truth. It's not like me to freak out about my sexuality...

My phone buzzes and I see that Cerise has sent a message back. 'What did you say? How did she react?'

'I told her that I don't know. She went quiet after that, like she had to think about that.' The way she went quiet, the way she started thinking, lost in her own brain, that's what's making me worry most.

'You don't know?!' Cerise adds surprised emoticons to her message and I can't help but smile I little.

Of course, I know. I've always liked girls the most. There is no surprise or question about that for me.

'Was she thinking in a doubtful way, or in a confused way?' The message makes me look up again.

'I have no idea. I can't read her right now. I don't know if I even want to know. What if it's bad?' I don't want to lose Fleur, I realise more and more that I really don't want to lose her. Not as a friend, but also not as potentially something more than a friend.

'Don't you think she would have responded differently if it was bad?' How can Cerise be so sensible about this?

'I have no idea.' I keep repeating myself. But I'm just as confused about myself. There is a fine line to walk between not telling and actively hiding who I am, and I don't know if I can really walk that line...