thousand words (random poetries!)

45: Hollowed

I'm hollowed ,
I'm no longer myself
Or am I getting crazy?
I'm lost in the realm of sorrow ,
Far far away from that " happy me "
Ever since that " dreadful evening! " ,
My life went from bliss to misery.
Like a lost child I've cried ,
Like a defeated soldier I've "died"
My failures are lethal...
It stings a lot ,
It's horrid and sad ,
Only my memories barely awake
Faded as the wind shatters my faltering emotions ,
Scarred as my heart's blackened
I'm wounded..
I'm alone..
I'm scared..
Yet no one sees my battles
No one understands ,
No one cares!
I'm tempted to end the sufferings ,
But my conscience saves me still
From my inner monsters ,
From inflicting greater grief
As I'm thousand feet above the cliff ,
I'm falling deeper despair
My crippled soul utter pleads ,
A silent scream that no one hears
I hate to admit it ,
But I do needed help!
I need someone to talked to ,
To lean on to ,
To recognized my pains ,
But reality sucks ,
I expected too much.. I guess
My sadness breeds hatred and anguish ,
My denial made me cynical
I'm having nightmares ,
I'm losing sleep.
It seems like life cheated on me ,
Or am I just unlucky and wrecked?
I've had enough depravity ,
Enough with this harrowing facades
A saving grace's all I seek ,
Or I'll be damned and broken
Well , I'm already is but...
My faith still lingers ,
A frail whispers of desperate prayer
My sanity's still with me ,
The " other side " can wait!...

~ nniiwwpoetry ~ 12/29/23