The Art of Love...🪬🫀

-25-

Listen to the song while you read.....🧘🏽‍♀️
Janet POV:
I didn't really want to tell Toni what was going on because truthfully I wasn't feeling up to it. But at some point you have to face the fact that you're not okay and you won't be okay unless you let someone help. Sometimes you need help and you have to accept it.

"Baby I've been going through some things recently and the truth is right now I'm suffering from depression. Sometimes I don't want to be alive or I wish I wont wake up in the morning." I said becoming teary eyed.

"Babe why didn't you tell me or something? I could've found a way to help you get through this." she said with pure sympathy.

"I know but something like this I'd like to handle on my own. I brought this onto my self trying to hide it or act like it's not there when it really is. I've been going through this since before I met you. It started right during me and Wissam's marriage. I'd try to push it to the back my head, and after I met you I thought it went away, but it found its way back. I don't want to talk about this anymore..umm moving on." I said wiping the tears from up under my eyes.

"I love you I hope you know that." she said kissing my lips.

"I love you too..." I said pulling her done to me and pecking her lips three more times and then slapping her ass. I can't get enough of that ass.

"Ms. Jackson we'd like to keep you a few days just to make sure everything is alright." The doctor said.

"Alright thanks Doc." I said combing my finger through Eissa's hair.

I really feel bad for bringing all of this onto Toni. It's not good for her lupus or this stupid shit I have going on. I fucking hate this shit. I feel like such a burden, after I leave the hospital I'm going to go away for a little maybe that'll make her feel good and better without my problems.

Toni POV:
Janet got out the hospital about 3 weeks ago and she's been acting funny. I know she depressed but that doesn't mean to leave me out and make me feel bad. I didn't do anything wrong but love her. She left around 10:30 this morning and it's going on 11:00 at night.

"Mommy where's Mamá?" Eissa asked.

"I don't know, do you want to call her and see?" I asked.

"Yes can I use your phone?" He asked and I unlocked it and gave it to him. It rung once, twice, three times, four times, and so on but she didn't answer. This is bad because when people are going through stuff like this it's never good when they don't answer the phone.

I know we have another house and that's where we said we were going before any of this had ever happened, so that may be where she's at. There a. 9/10 chance that it is where she's at.

Let me call Momma Kat and see If I can drop Eissa off real quick because I need to know that she's okay.

After calling Momma Kat she said just call her when I'm close by so I'm going to that and then go see about my wife.

Janet POV:
I was currently at the other house sitting on the floor of the kitchen with a bottle of tequila in my hand. Drinking from it every so often and crying. I wasn't thinking about Toni or Eissa I just wanted to be left alone. I know she's worried sick about me but at this very moment I don't care.

I got up and slightly stumbling back but still getting up. Since my first bottle was almost gone I went to get another one. Knocking pictures down, expensive art, vases, etc. I don't know how to cope with these things, but the alcohol is definitely helping... I think.

I walked into the bathroom because I had to pee, so I sat down and used it then got up washing my hands. As I was washing my hands I saw a blade. I was tempted to grab it so I did and then sat down on the floor, leaning up against the bathtub for support to sit up.

I drank some more then threw the empty bottle across the floor not caring if it shattered or not.

I could hear the voices of all the people who have tried to ruin my marriage because I'm not good enough for Toni. They were just telling me how I choice end it all and just die, I was agreeing with them at this point. I just want it all to go away, I don't give a fuck anymore. 

I poured some of the tequila on my arm to kill the germs and then made a deep incision on the left wrist. Maybe if I'm dead everything will go away. I made another deeper incision on the same arm but closer to my shoulder.

As I watched myself bleed out a lot of things started rushing through my head and I was slowly drifting away. This is what Toni would've wanted since I'm such a burden. Right?

"I love you baby, see you on the other side." I said as everything went black.

Toni POV:
I walked in the other house to see everything as a total mess. My baby was going through it bad and she thought she could handle it but turns out she really can't. I feel so bad that I didn't suspect this, hell I'm her wife for godsakes.

I didn't see her anywhere downstairs so I checked our bedroom upstairs and she wasn't there. Then I checked the guest room right across from ours and there she laid, bleeding to death. I began to panic seeing her laying there lifeless so I called Joey and then an ambulance to come get her.

Once Joey arrived the ambulance arrived shortly after pushing me out of the room to get her on the stretcher and take her to the hospital. I rode with her to the hospital since I'm in no state to be driving around right now.

When we got the hospital they immediately took her back and I called the Jackson family along with Tamar and my mother. When our mothers come together they're unstoppable. It's the best thing ever, I swear.

Once they'd all arrived they were there to comfort me and Eissa, he just came and laid on my chest. He's too young to be experiencing all of this and I hate that he is. She just needs love and to be shown that this is not her fault. If it wasn't for me and all my baggage then we wouldn't be in this predicament.

"Is the wife of Janet Jackson present?" the doctor asked.

"That's me!" I said popping up out of my seat.

"Follow me this way.." he said leading the way.

To Be Continued....