"THe Only THERaPisT You're evEr gonNA bE iS a COnvERSIoN THerapiSt BECaUsE You mAke all ThE GAY MEn sTraIgHT!!!"
-Fayrouz Khalid, roasting Tamari
but yeah
read this story or demon Cakey is gonna get you and eat your heart out, ain't that right?
May...
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I'm fucking sleepy. But whatever who cares.
So first we gotta state the obvious. These two mfs are the same. Because bruh. They just are trust me.
Now we gotta talk about which song is better. It doesn't matter they both hit harder than my dad hit me when I got bad grades that one time.
Aesthetic. They're both fucking adorable and I will sell my own respiratory system for those outfits. They a 100000000/10.
Popularity? Gumi-Cat would win by a long shot.
They're both iconic songs. And they're both relatable. You know, trying to be someone else to make others happy? That's the vibes I get from these songs.
Lyricism... idk which has better lyrics. But they're both really deep. But AoaPP's lyrics are a bit deeper.
Vocals are both crispy asf. I meant juicy. I menat-
In a cook-off, Obsequious is bound to win. But in a fashion show, Gumi-Cat would win. Not because she dresses better, but because... idk. Something with mirrors.
But if these two got into an actual fight somehow (idk what they'd fight over, the last Thanksgiving turkey? Idk), we gotta think of some stuff.
Like weapon choice. If they could only use what were in their individual PVs, Gumi-Cat would only have a hand mirror, and Cakey would have a whole goddamn arsenal compared to that.
I'm talkin a chocolate cake, cupcakes, cake stands, a plate for the chocolate cake, a table (maybe?) , a cake knife, a big ass fork and knife a trashcan... and a shit ton of lace. That's all I can think of off the top of my head tho.
A fucking hand mirror is NUHTHING compared to that.
Bonus points if Cakey could break that mirror. Not the glass part cuz that's unlucky, but the actual thing the glass is in. Then it'd be literally useless. And Gumi-Cat would have nothing.
So overall, the winner is...
There is none. Not with these statistics. I need better statistics because I'm too sleepyyyyyyyyyy help mehhhh
