Countless

Chapter 17

[Key]

It was nice meeting Mabel's mum. She was the exact opposite of her, short and portly whereas May was tall and slim. She was so nice and funny that I had a great time.

It was the middle of the night when I was awakened by May's phone ringing. She answered it and got out of bed, speaking in hushed tones in the hallway. I could still hear though.

"Why are you calling me? I thought I said not to call me again."

There was silence as she listened to the other person.

"I don't care that it's been two years, nothing has changed."

She began pacing.

"Of course you need money. How much this time?"

She stopped suddenly. "That much?! I certainly don't have that. I can give you £50, that's it."

She began pacing again as I listened in harder.

"It's not my fault you're always in trouble. Are you taking the money or not?"

The person must have agreed because May said, "great, I'll send it then. Don't talk to me again."

She hung up and sighed. It took her a little while to come back into bed and lie down. I didn't let her know I was awake; I had the feeling she didn't want me to know about the call.

The next morning she seemed elsewhere, so I tried to ask her about it over breakfast.

"Everything alright?"

"Mmm?"

"You seem distracted."

"Oh." She smiled. "It's nothing."

"Okay then." I smiled, but I knew something was up. Should I just ask her or wait for her to tell me?

We went out that day for a walk, and I put on shorts. She gave me a look from the other side of the room.

"What?"

"Nothing. I just love it when you wear shorts. You've got great legs."

I could feel myself blushing. "Thank you."

"You might get cold though."

"It's alright."

We walked side by side, not saying much. I took her hand and put it in my pocket with mine, making her smile a little. This whole situation was killing me, so I decided to ask.

"Last night, I heard you get a phone call. Who was it?"

She looked up at me, startled. "You heard that? I tried not to wake you up."

"It sounded like someone you didn't want to hear from."

She sighed and stopped walking, taking her hand out of mine. Looking away, she fiddled with her sleeve.

"It was my sister," she said, finally.

"Oh. Sasha, right?"

"Yeah. She needed money."

"Okay."

Mabel started walking again and I kept up with her.

"If you don't mind me asking, what happened between you too? I know you said you haven't talked in forever."

"Not in two years."

"So what happened?"

She sighed and looked away again.

"Is this something you're afraid I'll judge you for again?"

She nodded and my heart broke a little. I really didn't care about where she came from and what had happened in her life, but she clearly had hangups from past experiences. I hoped she'd learn to trust that I wouldn't judge her in time.

"Baby, I won't judge you." I stopped and grabbed her shoulders. "I love you, okay?"

I stroked her face and she closed her eyes, nodding.

"Can we sit?" she asked.

"Sure."

We sat on a bench and I waited for her to explain.

"My upbringing was kind of difficult with all the financial difficulties we faced as a family. I never knew my dad but Sasha knew hers, he was around on and off. I used to think he was my dad too, and we'd always fight over that. We actually fought a lot in our childhood. I wanted to do better for myself so I studied hard at school and went to university, but she..." 

She paused to take a breath.

"She went down a different path. She was never good at school and got in with the wrong people. They got her into a life of drugs." She swallowed hard. "What followed was years of promises and attempts to stop, her asking for money because she got into trouble again, you name it. Two years ago we got into a massive argument and I told her not to contact me again, that I didn't have a sister anymore and I didn't care what happens to her."

We were both silent for a while. Mabel wiped a tear from her cheek. "You think I'm cruel, huh?"

"Of course not." I put my arm around her. "I can't understand what it's like, I've never been in that situation."

Tears kept falling down her face. "Sometimes I feel like I'm a bad person for giving up, but I couldn't take any more."

I rubbed her arm in what I hoped was a comforting way.

"It's okay, I understand." I gently wiped her tears. "You answered the phone when she called, it shows you still care."

She nodded and looked down. "I worry sometimes. She got herself into trouble again."

"What kind of trouble?"

"She owes money again. She wanted quite a lot out of me."

"How much?"

She looked at me. "You aren't thinking of giving her the money, are you?"

I shrugged. "Would that be a bad idea?"

"Yes! She'll never stop asking you for money afterwards. And I'll feel mortified. It's already hard for me that you always pay for everything."

"But I want to buy you things. I love you so much that I just want you to have the best."

She smiled and squeezed my arm. "I love you, Kibum."

She reached up for a kiss.

"Besides, I don't know if she knows about you. Unless mum told her."

"Does your mum still talk to her?"

"Yes, when she can."

I nodded. "This is all very taxing for you, so how about we go do something fun?"

She smiled and nodded. "I'd like that."

"Let's go then."

I linked my arm with hers and we went on our way.