Fuck It, I Love You - Katya Zamo

ex couple etiquette

~ flashback ~

You had a great night of sleep once your mind finally allowed you to relax after thinking nonstop about what transpired between you and Brian. It felt like you were dreaming, and you do wonder so as you sit up and drag yourself out of bed. Checking yourself in the mirror, you become a little more self conscious than usual, changing out of a worn out shirt, your favorite to sleep in since middle school.

The uncertainty of it all made you nervous to be around him, you were afraid to screw your friendship up. But you know that you can't stay in your room forever, so you take one last look in the mirror and sigh, this could turn out to be so bad. And then the second you're out the door, you bump into a damp Brian who happened to be exiting the bathroom just as you were about to enter it.

"Oh, shit. Sorry..." He apologized, a hand instinctively coming to rest on your arm as you both came to your senses.

"It's fine..." You smile awkwardly, trying so hard to keep your eyes from lowering to his shirtless body, and ignore the fact that he was naked except for a towel wrapped around his waist.

Everything's silent for a moment as you stare at each other. Brian seemed to be thinking of the right thing to say to you, but looked unsure. "Alright..." He moved to let you walk in, walking past you to go change. You close the door and sigh, brushing your teeth while your mind raced nonstop about the situation you found yourself in. As you walk out of the bathroom, you realize Sasha's still sleeping, which means that you and Brian are by "yourselves".

You open the fridge, making a mental note that you desperately needed to get some groceries. You search for a pan to cook, getting distracted from the thought of Brian for that moment, only to be startled by his presence once he enters the kitchen.

"Morning..." He said, his voice still husky.

"Good morning" You look at him as he joined you at the counter, pouring some orange juice into a cup.

Things went silent once more as you tried to ignore the elephant in the room. You struggled to reach the pan that happened to be at the top of the cabinet, Brian noticing your struggle, was quick to get it for you. Your fingers touching as he handed you the pan, sending a jolt of electricity through you.

"Thanks" You smile softly, but he looks a little more serious than usual.

"Is Sasha still asleep?" He asked.

"I think so" You answer, starting to feel a bit uneasy.

"So... wanna talk about it?" He turned to face you, his arms crossed as he leaned against the counter.

"Talk about what?" You face him now, deep down already knowing what he was talking about.

"Us kissing last night" He bites his lip, looking as apprehensive and unsure about the situation as you.

"It wasn't that big of a deal" You respond nonchalantly, making it look like he was the one reading too much into things. That was not what you wanted, of course, but you were so nervous that you didn't even realize it.

"We almost had sex, (Y/N)" He scoffed, his eyes widened as he looked incredulous.

"What do you want me to say?" You ask, not sounding unbothered or stressed, genuinely asking him, wanting to know how he feels about you.

"To be completely honest, I really hope you don't regret it. Because I like you, probably since I first saw you sitting across the room, something about you made me want to get close to you, and I did. And we are friends now and I love our friendship, but I don't know how much longer I could go pretending I only like you as a friend, (Y/N)" The more he talked, the more you felt like you were dreaming.