Fuck It, I Love You - Katya Zamo

used to be my girl

~ flashback ~

You and Sasha practically threw yourselves on the couch as you'd just moved into your first ever apartment, having just finished assembling your couch. She looked at her watch, her eyes widen but you don't know why that is, she turns to face you and notices your confused expression.

"Brian's coming over, I forgot to tell you" She hesitantly shares the news.

"He's WHAT?" Your eyes widen. "Why?" You groan.

"Because we're looking for a roommate...remember?" You sigh, rushing your steps as you get up to look at yourself in the mirror.

"I look like shit" You look at your disheveled mess, fixing your hair.

"No you don't. And even if you looked like shit, Brian would still look like an idiot every time he looked at you" She said from the other room.

It's January and you'd just gotten back from your parents, but your classes don't begin for yet another week. You came back early so that you could help Sasha move in with you, she was in charge of things and you generally just follow her lead. Which explains why you didn't know about Brian coming to visit you this afternoon.

You had talked to him over the phone through the break, he quickly became one your closest friends there. You, Brian and Sasha had developed a strong bond, and if there's anyone to move in with you, that person has to be Brian. However, that doesn't mean your crush on him had disappeared. You'd been basically bottling your emotions up every time you're around him, which is not at all healthy.

"You're making this up, Sasha. Besides, wasn't he having a fling with that design boy?" You walk back to the couch.

"Not anymore. Didn't he tell you that?" She questions.

"No, he barely says anything about his love life to me..." You answer, feeling butterflies at the thought that you're finally seeing him again.

"I don't know, that seems suspicious to me..." She looks at you, smiling wickedly. "Are you and Camila done for good?"

"We were never a thing, Sasha" You clarify. "And answering your question, yes, we're done"

"It's funny that this all happened around the same time, you and Brian..." She says in a suspicious tone.

"What exactly are you trying to insinuate?" You swallow hard.

"I know you really well by now, (Y/N)" She smiles softly. "I'm not holding it against you, by the way" She made it clear.

"It's hopeless, the whole thing" You laid your back against the cushions.

"I get that you're afraid of getting hurt, especially now that you've become so close" She tried to make things easier on you. "But I'm telling you, by the look of things, I just know you'll probably be making out the next party we go to, or maybe even before"

There's a knock on the door, and you two immediately shoot up and walk to the door. Brian's standing there, smiling big to be seeing the two of you again as Sasha welcomes him in, having him hug her tightly. You smile at the scene before his eyes take on a certain glint once they found yours, that you wouldn't normally notice until your conversation with Sasha earlier. He hugged you tightly much like he had done to Sasha, only this time, pressing a kiss to your head as he pulled back to look at you. Biting his lip and containing a grin.

"Fuck, I missed you two so much" He smiled big.

"We missed you too, dickhead" Sasha replied. You found cute how they were each day more like brother and sister. You and Brian just had a different vibe with each other and you're not sure that's entirely your fault. "Let us show you around..."