Claudia Lockwood-Mikaelson

Chapter 24 - Heat

It's the fourth time this week I'm giving yet another excuse to Maeve as to why I don't want to cook dinner together. I've been insisting it's because I hardly have any time. I'm meant to be at university so I've been spending all my time away from her studying, trying not to fall behind. In reality I'm so overwhelmed with anxiety I can't bring myself to eat much. It makes my days a little easier when I eat less as I'm numb and my emotions don't take over me.

"Are you sure?" She questions me. She's remained in the guest room for the whole week since fighting with Elijah and has barely left so I feel slightly guilty at turning her down again. I know she would leave her room for it but I can't bring myself to agree. I feel like such a bad friend.

"Yes, I have so much to do. Maybe next week?" I add trying to give her a little hope. If I'm honest I have no intention of making and eating dinner with her.

She nods before asking me about Nik. "You've spent all your time with me or studying. What about Klaus? Have you spent time with your mate?"

"A little," I say to her. I don't know how much I should talk about Nik. I don't want to distress her any further over Elijah's cruel treatment. I don't want her to start comparing him to how well Nik is treating me at the moment. "Not yet today but I'll see him this evening."

"Go, don't stop seeing your mate just because mine's being a dick," she attempts a laugh at her situation. "Please Claudia, if I can't spend time with my mate I'll have to live through you, so go," she insists and I give in to her demands.

"Fine, but text me if you need anything," I tell her sternly and she agrees. "Don't worry about disturbing me, if you need me, I'll be there."

I head downstairs to the kitchen where I stand in front of the cupboards. They're all open as I stare at the packets of pasta and rice next to the tinned tomatoes. Nope, nope, nope and nope. I scan through the shelves, I don't fancy any of it. I start to cook some vegetable egg fried rice to leave out in case Maeve decides she is hungry. If she asks I'll tell her I ate some of it too.

The temperature of the room makes me start to sweat and I pour myself a glass of cold water. I only allow myself to drink half of it which is stupid but it's all I can have at the moment without feeling sick. Opening the fridge, I sigh as I eat a few strawberries from the punnet. I immediately feel nauseous and have to stop. I'll try again tomorrow.

A light headache starts and I realise I haven't eaten all day. I brace myself putting my hands on the table as I close my eyes taking deep breaths. I touch my forehead with my palm and it's burning hot. The water hasn't helped cool me down, I'm sweating now. I must be ill.

Turning off the cooker, I place the saucepan with the rice and vegetables in on the side to cool and I slowly make my way upstairs. With each step I feel as though I'm getting hotter and hotter. I grit my teeth together to avoid biting my tongue in pain as my headache intensifies.

I find myself outside Nik's room rather than my own and I don't bother knocking before I enter. I try to hold back tears as I realise he isn't in here. I need my mate, everything hurts, where is he? I crawl into his bed and my eyes glaze over at the feel of the cool sheets beneath me in contrast to my uncomfortably hot flesh. I can smell he has slept here recently and curl up in the sheets wishing he was here too. What is happening to me?

Throwing off my top to cool down I consider getting in his shower but the pain holds me back as I don't think I can walk over there. Another jolt of pain floods my body and I start shaking suddenly getting chills down my arms. I'm not sure whether I'm too hot or too cold.

My head is completely foggy and all I can think about is Nik. My handsome mate. My gorgeous mate. I am so lucky. I cry out in pain wishing he was here to take it away, this is worse than the full moon and it takes me a moment to realise it's still weeks away. I'm definitely not transforming. So what is wrong with me?

I'm scared as a new burning sensation fills my chest. I think back to what Nik told me about mates feeling each others' pain. I can only assume this is his pain I'm feeling right now or otherwise he would be here with me, sensing it as my own. The thought that he might be hurt makes me feel a thousand times worse.

The door swings open and Nik walks in before stopping dead in his tracks, his face going white as he sees me in pain on his bed. I'm relieved he seems okay, it must be me that is ill. Heat rushes to my cheeks as I realise his eyes are on my chest and my top is still where I left it, flung on the floor. I'm not embarrassed with him as I normally would be though.

"Nik," I croak and my throat feels so scratchy and dry. I lick my lips and his eyes follow the motion. "I don't know what's wrong, please help me."

"It's your heat. It's pushing us to complete the bond," he tells me. Excitement fills my body at knowing the solution but he still makes no movement towards me. He stares at me his feet planted firmly on the floor not caring that he could take all my pain away. He doesn't want to help me.

"Do you not want me as your mate?" I cry and push myself off his bed to stand. His head shoots up alarmed at my question but before he can deny me my legs give out from the pain. His arms come around me catching me before I hit the floor and the fiery-hot sensation settles. While it doesn't completely disappear it's far more tolerable now.

His shirt becomes soaked with my tears as I realise he hasn't answered my question. He clearly doesn't want me. I wonder if he's found someone he thinks would be a better mate than me. If Elijah can deny Maeve, Nik may do the same.

"Why are you crying love? Does this not help?" He asks me very gently, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

"You don't love me, you don't want to be with me and complete the bond. Have you found a different mate?" I reply, still shaking from the pain as he cradles me in his arms.

"No of course not Claudia. I don't want anyone else," he exclaims as he picks me up and places me back on the bed with him. "I don't want to hurt you or do anything you might regret."

His explanation takes a while for me to understand but eventually my tears stop. My brain is so foggy and all I can think about is him, how close he his and everywhere his body makes contact with mine. How could I regret completing the bond with him? Does he think I don't want him?

I can feel my body warming up again. Our initial contact isn't enough to hold back the pain and I clench my hands into fists to hold back a sob. My enhanced hearing picks up his heart beating rapidly and I realise he's more affected by this than he has let on. I'm impressed at his control. But I'd rather he let go.

"Nik," I tug off his shirt and he lets me, his eyes on my bra again as his hands come to rest on my waist. "Please."

"We can't complete the bond love, I will not have you regret anything with me," he says sincerely but I can tell his control is wavering.

"Please," I beg him again, upset at his clear rejection of me. "You're my mate, how could I regret it?"

He swallows as both our heart rates increase. His heated gaze taking in my body makes me want him even more. He suddenly frowns. "You've lost weight," he notices and I shake my head. I'm fairly sure he believes me, or at least he can't tell I'm lying through my pulse since my heart is racing being so close to him anyway.

To distract him I lean down to kiss him but he hastily flips our positions. He pushes me down flat on the bed before hovering over me and sealing his lips over mine. He groans as I kiss him back hard, moulding his body to me. I can't seem to get enough of him, I run my hands over his arms thankful that the pain has faded for now. It seems as though Nik has given in somewhat and I hope he has changed his mind about completing the bond.

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Get yourselves ready for the next chapter 🥵
Ceryn x